Rayanna, the very naughty mouse. Chapter 2.

I broke a promise to Daddy, my punishment was to write a 1000 word story about breaking promises and disobeying orders. I hope this shows how sorry I am.

 

Rayanna, the very naughty mouse.

Chapter 2.

Pappa mouse sat Rayanna on the floor in front of him. They were in her hollow, Pappa mouse was on her cot. “Rayanna I’m very upset that you disobeyed me again, you put yourself in danger then you put me in danger and the rest of the family. All so we could rescue you from the grimakin. I’ve told you it is dangerous in the grassland, I want you to promise you never go out there without one of the grownup mice. Promise me Rayanna.” Pappa mouse told her. Rayanna didn’t want to promise as she knew she would want to do it again but she saw her Pappa’s stern face so putting her hands behind her back, she crossed her fingers so he wouldn’t see and said, “Yes Pappa, I promise I will never go into the grassland without a grownup. I won’t disobey you again.” Rayanna looked down to the floor, she uncrossed her fingers and brought to her hands to her front as she began twiddling her fingers. Her Pappa watched her for a few seconds, he felt certain she would disobey him again.  “Rayanna, I’m warning you, DO NOT think about going out there again. You WILL NOT DISOBEY THIS ORDER. Understand me ?” Her Pappa ordered, Rayanna nodded her head. Her Pappa shook his head, he knew his naughty little girl would try to visit the grassland again. “Stand up and come here.” He instructed her, pointing to the side of him.

“Rayanna you will bend over my knees and I’m going to spank you, because I don’t believe you understand the seriousness of what you did. That grimakin could have killed you and eaten you, the bowwow’s would kill you too.” Pappa said.

“Pappa, I can run faster than them, the grassland is exciting, there’s nothing to do in our hollow.” Rayanna interrupted, stamped her paw on the floor and folded her arms. “You will do as you’re told.” Pappa mouse said, grabbing her arm, he pulled her over his knee. She had never been spanked before, her brothers and sisters had, even Mamma mouse had spankings from Pappa. He held her tail, put one leg over her legs and began spanking her. Rayanna kicked, cried, fought against her Pappa but he held her tightly. Pappa mouse spanked his little girl until her bottom turned a bright reddie brown colour. Then he stopped, lifting her up he cuddled her tightly.

“Rayanna I am deadly serious about this, disobey me and you will be getting a much more serious punishment than you’ve just had. Now you can get ready and go to bed. Mamma will bring you some supper. You will not leave your cot.” Pappa told her as Rayanna still cried. He kissed her forehead, “Pappa still loves you, I just want you safe.” Then he left her hollow. Rayanna climbed on her cot and cried into her pillow, she didn’t understand why it was such a big deal. After a while she stopped crying, rubbing her hot, sore bottom, she changed into her nightie and climbed into her cot.

 

Two days later Rayanna was left on her own in the hollow, she was bored. Suddenly she heard strange noises, she knew it was the giants, they sounded close. She crept out of the hollow, looking around for any of her family. No one was around so she scurried out, running around the massive flowers and enormous trees, she hid behind a big pot and watched the giants. It looked like they were playing, like she does with her brothers and sisters, but the giants were louder and she felt the ground pounding when they played closer. Rayanna crept closer, hiding in between the big flowers, peeking through the grass. Suddenly a huge round thing bounced towards her, she ran to hide behind a stone. One of the giants ran over, just as the giant was going to get the thing that went past her, the giant gave a screech, and before Rayanna knew what was happening, the giant got a pot and dropped it over her. Everything went black, scaring Rayanna.

She felt something go under the pot and under her then slowly she went topsy-turvy as the pot went the other way around. The giant took the top off, blinding Rayanna for a minute as the bright light shot down, as she looked up she saw lots of giants faces. They were just staring at her. Rayanna was so scared, now she wished she had obeyed her Pappa mouse, but she didn’t know what to do now, could these giants kill her like Pappa said the grimakin and bowwow’s could.

Suddenly one giant reached into the pot, trying to catch her, she kept trying to scurry away but the pot was only small. The giant caught her, holding her firmly in its big hands. The giant stood up, still holding Rayanna, when she looked down, the ground looked a long way down. All the giants gathered around her, big fingers stroking her head, poor Rayanna was petrified. She couldn’t move her body but she did feel a little safe. These giants seemed to just look at her, not try to kill her. The giant holding her opened it’s hand a bit more, Rayanna stayed still, too scared to move, as these giants ran a finger over her body. All the giants took turns to touch her, Rayanna felt herself shaking inside. The giants made some strange noises, like a cooing noise the big birds make. Then the giant holding her, bent down and put her back on the ground.

As soon as she was released Rayanna ran away as fast as possible, shaking and crying because she was so scared. She ran into the hollow straight into her Pappa. “Rayanna what’s the matter ? where have you been ?” He asked as she held him tightly, crying and shaking still. She couldn’t speak, so Pappa mouse picked her up and went to sit down with her, holding her, rocking her until she calmed down.

“Pappa, I……I…..broke my promise, I disobeyed you. I went out to the grassland, there were lots of giants playing like I do with all my brothers and sisters, but they found me and caught me. Pappa I was so scared, I thought they were going to kill me but they just wanted to touch me. Pappa they just made funny noises then they put me down again. I ran so fast, faster than I’ve ever run to get home. Pappa I’m so sorry I disobeyed you, I understand about it not being safe, but those giants were nice.” Rayanna got suddenly scared of what her Pappa what thinking. His face looked angry, so angry, he didn’t speak for a minute. “Rayanna I can’t believe you’ve disobeyed me again when I explicitly told you not to go out there again. I’m just so mad right now but more upset with you. You promised you would not do it again, you promised Rayanna. I’m just upset that you actually did this. If it was one of the other giants or those giant animals, they could have really hurt you, or even worse, they could have killed you.” Her Pappa said. “Just go to your hollow and get in your cot. I’m too upset to deal with you now.” Rayanna slowly walked to her hollow, she had really upset Pappa, and she hated seeing that he was angry and upset with her. She crawled into her cot and began crying. Crying because she had been so scared but also because she had upset her Pappa. She had never thought it would have upset him, yes he would have been mad with her but she didn’t think it would’ve made him upset, but she had made a promise to her Pappa. She would have to accept whatever punishment Pappa decided to give her. Soon her tears stopped and dried up on her face, she felt awful, sad and very very guilty and upset.

A few hours later Pappa mouse came to see her. He sat on a chair whilst Rayanna sat up on the cot. “I understand how exciting it must be for you to want to explore the outside world. But you’ve now seen the dangers that are out there. You could have really hurt yourself, or worse. I’m cross that you disobeyed me, but I’m more upset that you did it, that you broke your promise. That’s upset me so much more Rayanna. If you really wanted to go outside then you should have come to me or Mamma and we may have agreed but gone with you.” “I’m sorry Pappa, I didn’t think you would say yes, so I didn’t ask you. But I’m really, really sorry Pappa.” Rayanna said, tears brimming her eyes and slowly slid down. “Rayanna you will have 500 lines to write, you have 2 days to do them. You will have an early bedtime for a month and grounded for that month. I will be giving you a spanking but I will do it when I’m ready, and at the moment I’m still too upset to do it. I suggest you get on with your lines. They are,

“I will not break a promise and disobey an order given by my Pappa.”

Pappa got up and left the hollow, as Rayanna slowly got up, got her notepad and sat at her desk, then she started doing her lines. She deserved this punishment but she hated to know she had upset her Pappa so much. She will do anything to make things better, then her Pappa reappeared, “I still love you baby girl, I want you to know that. I will always love you.” He walked over and gave his naughty little daughter a kiss, “I love you too Pappa and I’m really sorry. “ Rayanna whispered. “I know Ray, the matters forgotten with now baby girl. Take your punishment and then we can forget about it, but it’s forgotten now, Ray. Carry on with your lines. I will spank you when I’m ready, in a day or two, and it will be a very painful spanking Rayanna. You won’t sit down for a week.” He walked away, blowing her a kiss which she caught and rubbed on her heart like they had done since she was a baby. She was forgiven. She felt her Pappa’s love even when she’s been naughty, but she will try to be good from now on. Try being the main word.

 

Word count – 1770.

 

                               

Sinful Sunday – Corner Time.

Put in the naughty corner because as usual, I argued,  refused to do as I was told and was disrespectful to Master. This was 2 years ago, thankfully my behaviour has improved so I don’t get corner time often

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Sinful Sunday

 

Blogging A -Z Challenge = U.

Blogging A – Z Challenge – U.

U = Urine.

“I’m sick and tired with your brattiness today, you’re acting like a child. You are not a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Now behave.” Master shouted at me.

I stamped the floor, pouted and crossed my arms defiantly.

“Nooooooo, I really……..” I started, Master smacked my bottom.

“Young lady, I want you to go upstairs, put your white school panties, socks and pumps on, with your white leggings. You can wear your white blouse too. Take these 2 bottles of water and drink it all. Do not dare tip any out.” Master ordered, I looked confused, I didn’t understand why he wanted me to wear those clothes or drink the water but he looked at me so sternly, I scurried upstairs quickly. Getting changed I drank one bottle, still had no clue what was going to happen, but I stomped downstairs again, drinking the other bottle of water as I went.

“Finally you do as you’re told first time. Come with me.” He walked towards the back door, picked a garden chair up and placed it in front of the big patio doors.

“Sit down there.” Master pointed to the chair, so I sat down, looking up at him with confused sad eyes.

“Now I’m going inside and I’m going to watch you through the window because I want to watch you piss yourself.” He explained.

Suddenly I went to get up, protests on the tip of my tongue but Master held my shoulders so I couldn’t get up.

“Stay there, little girl. You will do as you’re told, you will stay there until you’ve pissed yourself then you can stay in your clothes, all wet, smelly and stained like the spoilt little toddler you’ve been acting like.” His voice was so loud and stern, I never spoke.

Sitting down, I sulked,  glaring at him as he went inside, then soon came into the living room, he opened the patio doors, saying he wanted to hear the piss drip onto the patio.

I’m not sure how long I stayed there before I got the sense that my bladder was full. Master was just working on his laptop, not paying me any attention. But I’m sure he may have been aware that I was starting to wiggle about, clenching my legs together tightly, they started to shake, as I held the side of the chair, squeezing everything as tight as possible to prevent my bladder from releasing it’s load of urine. Master has used wetting myself as punishment before, or using me as his toilet, him pissing over me, over my face or mouth. But this was something new.

Master walked into the kitchen where he could still see me, turning the tap on full, he smirked at me. Then getting more water out of the fridge, he passed me another 2 bottles. Then went to turn the tap off.

Suddenly, I felt a tiny release from my bladder, my lip quivered and my eyes filled with tears, I knew I couldn’t hold it any longer.

“Drink the water Daylia.” Master ordered, as I bounced up and down, I opened a bottle and drank a quarter of it.

Then the flow suddenly started, hot urine began to spread into my white clothes, filling my leggings before it dripped through the material, onto the floor. Master started to watch me intently.

“Stand up.” He ordered, as the flow hadn’t stopped, standing up, it flowed down my legs, filling my pumps before he told me to sit down again. The hot urine soon became cold, as the wet clothes clung to me, I began to smell it and noticed my clothes stained a little yellow, I just wanted to get out of them.

“Drink the rest of those bottles then you may come in.” I was told, Master had gone back to working on his laptop.

I quickly drunk the remaining first bottle, I wanted to complain that I couldn’t drink more, but I daren’t. So after a minute I started to drink the second one. By the time I drank it, my clothes were drying out, all stained yellow with a horrible wee smell.

“Come here Daylia.” Master called to me from his seat, certain I was going to be allowed to get a shower and change. I walked in, standing on a puppy pad and faced him.

He had placed a puppy pad on the floor in front of him, and told me to sit on it.

“Daylia you’ve been a very very naughty little girl, you’ve thrown 3 temper tantrums this morning, even after a spanking, and now you’ve wet your panties. You will stay in those dirty, smelly clothes like a little toddler may do, before a grownup realises she’s had an accident. Then they are cleaned up and put fresh clothes on, because a toddler is learning how to toilet train, learning how to behave. You’ve had this training already, you know right from wrong and how to behave yet today you didn’t care. So you can stay in those clothes and every time you need to empty your bladder, you will ask me if you may release it, and go outside, on your chair and piss there. You may only sit on your puppy pad, on the floor. You may only do some colouring or read, your back will face the television Understand ?” He asked.

Looking at the floor, I said “Yes Master.”

For the next 4 hours, Master kept handing me water to drink, I asked 8 times to release my bladder, I’d never drunk so much, each time my clothes became more stained and stank. I was allowed to take my pumps and socks off before coming inside, so I didn’t squelch wee out of them into the carpet, but each time I went outside I had to put them back on. Standing up halfway through the flow then sitting down again. I felt so dirty, humiliated and extremely degraded. This was no fun.

Finally at 5pm, I was told to get the hosepipe and wash the patio down, Master handed me some antibacterial liquid to pour over the patio and chair and the outside brush, to give everywhere a good scrub clean. After that, Master came out to check if I was done. I was just winding the hosepipe up. Handing me a carrier bag he told me to strip, and put the clothes in the bag.

“Here, Master ? Outside ?” I asked, even more mortified.

“Did I say come in and strip ?” His voice stern again. Shaking my head, I started to take all my clothes off, they were soaked, stained and stunk. The bag was so heavy with all my sodden clothes in it, I was going to put the bag in the bin.

“What are you doing ? They can go in the washing machine, use the antibacterial hot but gentle cycle. Check in the booklet what number it is, use plenty of powder and also use the antibacterial laundry powder. When you have done that come upstairs.”

He left me there, naked, holding my bag of pissie clothes. I was careful to dry my feet on the puppy pads, and decided on my own, to throw the pads in the bin before putting the clothes in the washing machine. Locating the number for the wash cycle, I put everything in and turned it on. Heading upstairs I heard the bath running, by the time I was there the bath was half full with lots of bubbles. Going for yet another wee, I climbed in the warm bath and enjoyed feeling clean again, washing the dirty smell off my body.

I’m not sure how long I was in before Master called to me that it was time to get out.

“Can I please stay in longer ?” I called out. Master came in, pulling the plug out, grabbing a towel and stood holding it out. He had a furious expression on his face when I realised maybe I shouldn’t have said it. I was surprised when Master towel dried me, hanging the towel back up he led me to the bedroom.

There were somethings on the bed, but just looked like a pile of clothes so I paid no attention. Master sat on the bed, standing me in front of him, still warm and damp from the bath.

“Daylia you are going to have to behave yourself otherwise I will start treating you like a child more often. And as you didn’t seem to like this punishment, I will do it regularly if I have to. Yet you still questioned me. What other punishment would a little girl get ?” He asked.

I looked on the floor until he lifted my chin up.

“A spanking Master.” I said quietly, tears filling my eyes.

“That’s correct, I’m going to spank your naughty bottom til it’s raw, then you will go to bed early. You may read and continue your colouring but that’s it. I will bring up a light dinner for you, and lights out will be 8pm.”

Master took my arm and pulled me over his knee. He pushed me up onto the bed more, pushed one leg down off his knee and put his other leg over my leg that was over his knee. I was locked in his strong grasp and knew I would not get out of it. Starting with his hand, the sting much more severe as my bum was already warm and still damp. Soon I began crying, trying to reach back when Master grabbed my hand and kept hold of it behind my back.

He always, always included spanking the back of my legs, inner thighs, pussy and all over my big, plump bottom. Then he stopped, rubbing and squeezing instead.

“I hope we don’t have to repeat this soon Daylia, otherwise this will happen often.” He reached behind him and in the corner of my eye I spotted the bath brush.

“No Master,  please, I promise I will be good. Please not that.” I cried into his back as I tried to get away; fruitlessly. As the first swing came crashing down I screamed into the bed, over and over Master swung it hard, from bottom down to leg, lifting each cheek to get access to my sit spot. I cried and cried, kicking my legs, punching the bed. I was sure my bum must be purple by now, knowing how lethal that brush was. But Master continued, telling me he needed to be sure I had learnt my lesson. “I have Master please.”

Stopping I almost prayed a thank you until he lifted me up, placing me back over the bed, then I knew it wasn’t. I saw him reaching something else but I couldn’t see what it was.

“I am giving you 5 strokes for every tantrum you had. How many tantrums did you have Daylia ?” He asked me.

“Three M….M……Master.” I muttered.

“So how many strokes will you get ?” Master asked.

“Ermmmm twelve ?” I’d forgotten how many he said for each tantrum.

“12!!! Daylia, 12!!! That answer earns one more stroke.” He laughed out loud. “Maths was never your strong point. Now listen, 5 strokes for each tantrum, you had 3 tantrums, just so you know, that’s 3 x 5, and 1 extra stroke for that wrong answer. But if you get this wrong, you get another 2 strokes. What’s the correct answer Daylia ?” He tried to stop laughing, honestly her maths was awful, he thought. He heard me giggle as the sum connected in my brain.

“16 Master.” I said, honestly I prayed it was right, I thought it was, but when he asks me to do sums during a spanking, my head just gets muggled.

“Well done Daylia. I think I’m going to have you do Maths exercises every day.  Okay, 16 strokes, now I want you to count them. What will happen if you give the wrong number ?” He asked me, his voice humorous but also intense again.

“I get 2 extra strokes, Master.” I told him, confident but also fearful to what exactly would give me the strokes.

“DO NOT MOVE Daylia.” He ordered.

He picked up the long shoe horn, his new toy from Ikea. A friend recommended this new implement, his little girl hated it. Raising his arm, he whipped the horn across my cheeks, causing me to shriek. I’m not sure how I counted to 16, I remembered I was quick because I wanted it over, this was even worse than the bath brush, might even be as bad as the high impact cane. It was evil, and as usual the strokes were on cheek, sit spot and legs.

But finally the last one came down harder across my sit spot, I grabbed my bottom and cried so hard.

Master sat down on the bed, pulled me up so I was sat on his knee, my bottom hanging between his legs. He hugged me tightly, stroking my back and hair, kissing my forehead lightly.

“All over baby. All done.” Master spoke softly, though he knew there was one more thing he had planned and expected a mini tantrum over it, he was looking forward to see the reaction.

“I’m sorry Master, I promise never to have tantrums again.” It was a promise we both knew I would never keep, secretly Master did enjoy them, and who could blame him. A whole afternoon humiliating and degrading me then spanking me.

“Bend over whilst I rub some cream in.” Master said, as he checked out the beautiful welts and bruises, taking a few photos for me as he knows I like to have them.

“All done, now stand up and turn around.” Master told me, I did as I was told, standing right in front of him.

He picked up this thing, what was that ? Was that a nappy ? My face must have shown my shock, Master had a stern yet devilish grin on his face.

“You’ve got to be kidding, I’m not putting a nappy on.” I said as calmly as I could, trying to back away.

But Master caught on with my plan, turning me around so my back was against him. He already knew which way round it went, lifting one leg, he put it through the hole, lifting the other, he pushed that through. As soon as he let go of my legs I tried kicking it off, which resulted in a few very hard smacks to the front of my legs.

“Naughty little girls who piss themselves need a nappy to sleep in, so you don’t do it again. Now I hope you’re not going to throw a tantrum after you just promised you wouldn’t, that would be a very bad idea.” As Master spoke, he pulled the nappy up, not overly gentle over my raw skin. Hearing me wince a little, Master smiled.

He turned me around and saw my sulky face, he secretly loved it. Master then produced a pink nightie, he put it over my head, hands through little cupped sleeves, as he smoothed it down. The cotton material had little teddy bears over it, but on the front, in shocking pink were the words, Master owns this naughty little girl. There was a picture of a teddy bear from the back view, there pink hair clips in her hair, her bottom was coloured crimson, the bear was bent forward as her arms reached down to pull up her nappy.

I looked down at the words, smiled a little, then turned around to the mirror to see the picture. Then I giggled, “Did you have this made especially ?” I asked.

“Only the best for my little girl, now into bed. Here’s your colouring books and pencil box and your kindle. I will bring you a sandwich, then brush your teeth, lights out at 8pm sharp. I love you baby girl, tantrums an all.”

This is a fictional story but as I wrote it, I thought it was quite exciting too and turned me on a lot. Master does enjoy pee play and I have had to pee outside as punishment, been peed over and drank his pee but it’s never been like to this extreme.

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Blogging A – Z Blogging = Q.

Blogging A – Z Challenge – Q

Q = Questioning.

As Master’s slave, I know I should do exactly as he says and I do try my hardest to be a good girl, following his instruction. But if you’ve read my previous blogs, you will know I’m also a bit bratty and naughty. And if I ask for something, and Master says NO, I do question it.

 

Why can’t I just order that book, it’s only 99p ?  NO ! Why not ? Coz you will just buy more and you have hundreds of books on your kindle that you’ve not read yet. When you’ve read them all, then maybe you can buy one !   Why ?

Can I buy this dress / skirt / top ?  No ! Why not ?

Can I stay up later ?  NO ! Why ? Coz you become a brat when you’re tired !

 

These are usually the questions I ask, I know what the answer will be, but it doesn’t stop me from asking.

This is something I do need to work on changing and since doing this challenge I have realised this so I’m finding myself stopping before saying that fatal word.

I can understand why Master gets frustrated with me when I question his decision. His decision should be final.

I will make it my goal to change this, I think this is like the final strands of giving up my independence and give Master my total submission, I read some blogs where the sub will be perfect, one slave does nothing without permission, can’t move, eat, drink, can only use the toilet with the door open, she does everything for her Master, but she seems to love it, which is the most important. Master doesn’t want a slave like this but I know he would like it if I stopped questioning him and just accept his answer, the first time, not after the fifth or sixth time of asking. Or until Master gets cross with me and then punishes me.

So there’s my letter for today = Q = Questioning, I hope if I do this challenge again, I will not put this word down for Q.

Blogging A- Z Challenge – N

Blogging A – Z Challenge = N

N = Naked and Naughty.

The idea of being naked was always a hard one, Yes I went from bedroom to bathroom naked when having a bath, never hiding myself when G or E were around. But oh no, the idea of others seeing me naked, no way, who wants to me naked. Entering into our D / s lifestyle, one rule Master insisted I did was take a naked selfie and post it on SpankingTube, he wanted me to learn to like, even love my body, like my curves, and even like my big ass. At first I hated doing it, but eventually I began to enjoy it and soon, I began to believe maybe I’m not that ugly, fat, small woman. I even began to sunbathe topless in our back garden. Then last year we had our first naturist holiday, I remember taking that first step outside of our lodge, it was terribly nerve-wracking, but I took that step without hesitation. And suddenly I felt free in my body, I no longer wanted to hide myself in the corner, this is the body I was given, so only I can accept it, love it and improve it, if that’s possible. No one else can do it for me. Even showing the ugly scar I have down my tummy, was hard to accept but my mother-in-law would say, every scar is part of your life so don’t be ashamed of them. And at the end of the day, the major operation I had changed my life, so in truth, maybe I should thank it, does that sound crazy ?

 

Being naked for Master did cause some stress for me whilst he trained me, I would sometimes have to sit in front of a mirror and really look at myself, placing a mirror between my legs I saw for the first time, what my pussy looked like. I’d never done that before. I hated bending over, ass out high, head low, revealing my most intimate areas but Master was very firm with this, if he wanted me like this for one minute or 30, I would do it and cringe inside. I really didn’t understand how he could find me / my body sexy. So the selfies continued as I tried different ways to make my body look good. Even taking my naked body outside in the garden and taking selfie after selfie. I started to look at the pictures differently, I saw a little sexiness, and I began to like them.

It was important for Master to feel my naked body in bed, knowing my body belonged to him, if hands wandered he didn’t want to fight with nightwear before connecting with skin. But feeling skin on skin is so important, whether in bed asleep as legs entwine with his, or during play, I should not be ashamed of my body. And I’m not now, but I am certainly a Naturist at heart, and can’t wait until we go again, then maybe book somewhere else, abroad maybe.

I’ve realised since doing this challenge that I have changed an awful lot since we began our D / s life, and all good changes, making me a better, more confident woman. I honestly hadn’t seen it until now.

 

Naughty.

 

I may be an owned slave to Master but I can very honestly say that I am not one of those slaves who are 100 % obedient, following the rules perfectly, I wasn’t a natural submissive so I’ve had to learn but there’s a tiny part of me that still wants to be me. But Master has trained me well, punishing me for my wrong doings, so every day rules, I normally follow properly. But you know, things like, I want more makeup, I ask Master if I’m allowed, if he says no, then that’s it. But a teeny part of me wants to say, you want me wearing makeup everyday, then let me buy it when I need it. Of course I don’t ( usually ) then buy any, but just like a child will try to get away with things, that’s me. I do like to call it mild rule breaking, only coz it sounds slightly better, maybe that’s my bratty side that feels that. But I’d never go to the shop and spend without asking. I know Master has only made it a rule because I have no sense of saving or generally watching the money in the bank, I just tended to spend, he’s tried for years to get me to stop. So I am very grateful that he controls this side of life, even if I moan, and I know I should follow this and all the rules fully. These days, it is usually only spending that gets me in trouble, that is usually including arguing because I want to buy something, like buying kindle books from Amazon. I have now stopped asking because I know the answer is no, but buying clothes from the catalogue, has been like buying Kindle books, because money it not actually changing hands, in my head I’m not spending or breaking the rules. But I’ve been told I can’t order anything without asking first. I do an order then ask my mother-in-law which she likes, usually keeping the ones I want, without asking Master’s opinion or if I could keep them. But I need clothes, right ? On my last order last week, I said to Master I wanted him to look at the clothes and help me choose. I did that because I realised something. I always want to look my best for Master, so letting him choose my clothes is another way of ensuring I will. He sometimes doesn’t like the clothes I pick out with my mother-in-law, she has a different taste to Master but who do I want to please, Master or my mother-in-law. Of course the answer is Master without a doubt. Out of the 12 dresses I ordered, I kept 5. But the next day when I was alone I realised that I should ask Master if I could keep these dresses, so when he was at work I asked him if I should have asked to keep them, he replied, yes. So even though I really really wanted all the dresses, I asked him if I could keep them, hoping he would say yes but ready to accept it, if his answer was no, anyway he replied, yes thank you for asking. This made me feel so so happy, not because I could keep the dresses but because I had pleased him by realising I should have asked first.

I think for me, I am learning slowly to be the submissive Master can be proud to own, though I hope he is proud of me now and soon I think I will be the best submissive I want to be. I can’t promise I won’t still want to buy makeup or clothes and throw a tantrum because Master has said no, but that’s part of my personality, and also Master then has the excuse of turning my fine curvaceous bottom crimson and bruised. 🙂

Blogging A – Z Challenge. J.

Blogging A – Z Challenge = J

( I appear to be brain dead today, so I’ve no idea if this will make sense, if it doesn’t I apologise. )

J = Just do as you’re told.

     Will you just stop arguing.

     You are just acting like a brat now.

Three sentences often said in our house.

Even though I am Master’s slave and I belong to him, there is still a part of me that is the old me, the one who wanted her own way, who sulked, whose very stubborn, got in a mood and ignored what G would say.

square1Now 3 years into this dynamic, I can still be that girl. Though I think as a girl, it’s quite *natural to be sulky, moody and stroppy, it’s in our genes.

But I’m learning not to argue, though it’s hard when sometimes you just want to be heard, or just want your own way.

I won’t lie and say I’m not moody, sulky and stubborn.

But now, even if I really want something, I accept Masters decision. It’s not often I go against him because the consequences are too severe and I don’t like disappointing him.

But still those 3 sentences are said frequently, my nature is still to argue and just get what I want. And if I really am having a tantrum Master will tell me I’m just acting like a brat. Sometimes this will make me stop, other times it will just make me worse so I have a tantrum.

I don’t think Master would want me to be exceptionally good, I know he enjoys telling me off, punishing me though I’m not sure he likes it when I throw a tantrum, but a severe spanking, an apology then cuddles means I’ve been forgiven.