My stubborn behaviour left me feeling so guilty, I had to own up about my indescretion.

Miss Adira set a new rule about July time, that I could not dye my hair my usual plum colour, not dye it at all. She wanted to see my natural hair color and I hate my natural colour, strawberry blond, it’s a bit dull, boring. Much preferring the bold, bright purple or bright chilli red. It kinda makes a statement, shows my real personality. I was not happy at all, every week or so, I asked and the answer was always no. After a month or so, I heard her tell Master that she was only doing it to wind me up, it was funny. Well I was fuming when I heard that, I said, “Well if that’s the case then, I will dye my hair this week.” “No you will not.” She stated, I could tell she meant every word. 

There was no changing her mind, and I was getting more and more peeved about it. By late October my stubborn, pigheaded head was working overtime, my bratty head began working too much. One night I was sat in bed, it was time for me to turn the TV off and do some colouring for 20 minutes, Miss Adira’s rule.

I began thinking, Well if Miss Adira won’t let me dye my hair, then I’m not gonna do my colouring and I’m gonna watch TV until 10pm, so there. IMaging me pulling my tongue out as well, being a real brat.

So it began, I had this thought every night, but because I’m so stubborn, I continued my deception. Thinking I had one over Miss Adira. 

As time went on, I began to feel terribly guilty. But the more she repeatedly said No to me, the more I continued. I often worried if Master had got the camera in our room working so Miss Adira or Daddy could connect to it and see what I was up to. 

I also wondered why Miss Adira hadn’t asked where was my daily photograph to show the colouring I did the night before. She never asked once. Naturally I never mentioned it, but I was very surprised about her non-reaction.

This was very unlike Miss Adira, She is always on the ball with my tasks,  knowing immediately if I’ve missed one, yet she still said nothing.

I think this made my guilty feeling become stronger, By the end of November every night I felt immense guilt turning the lights and TV off at 10pm, but I continued. The same thoughts going in my head, Well if DiDi won’t let me dye my hair, then I’m still not doing my colouring. I know it’s pathetic, ridiculous and most of all very childish.

After our lovely weekend celebrating Miss Adira’s birthday, I thought I had to own up. It was getting closer to Christmas, my guilt was building inside, so just before Christmas I told her, well I thought I messaged her on Whatsapp, but I couldn’t find it so I asked DiDi to look. Apparently I wrote it in my daily diary and on Whatsapp, I got this message, “Just dye your hair.” I replied “No, I’m not doing it.”

By now, I’d kinda accepted that I was never gonna be able to dye me hair again, I’d just have to deal with the colour, it didn’t help when Daddy kept telling me to just dye my hair. I repeatedly told him, “It is more than my life is worth.” So I was starting to accept my natural hair colour.

Then on Boxing Day when we were exchanging gifts, Miss Adira handed me a basket filled with little gifts, the first thing I saw was a box of hair dye, exactly the one I use. Apparently Master had the job of trying to find a box of my hair colour in my bedroom cupboards, take a picture of it and send it to DiDi, so she could buy the right one. It was quite a task for him to do it without me seeing or finding it out.

So you can imagine the guilt I felt then. It was the worst feeling ever. And as the days went on, Miss Adira still said nothing about my indiscretion. On the 2nd January the boys were back at work, the rules were starting again, after being allowed a Christmas break. I asked Miss Adira if the bedtime rules restart, she replied. “You would presume correct.” 

Again there was no other comment from her, I swear this is like the worst punishment I could have about this. My guilt was just bursting out, it was killing me just waiting for her to say something about it.

On the 8th January I asked again, “Are you ever going to bring up the bedtime crime ?” I asked her, I was feeling really guilty about it. She sent me a very happy, smiley emoji as her reply. “That’s why you’re not saying anything isn’t it, coz you know this was as bad as receiving a punishment.” I stated. “Yup,” she said. “Oh that’s cruel, so so cruel,” I replied. “Yes I am,” DiDi answered. “But still loves ya,” I told her. “Love you more,” she answered.

From then on, my guilt started to lift, it was very slow, and at bedtime I still thought about it. So my rule is bedtime at 9pm, watch TV until 9.40pm, turn the TV off and do some colouring until 10pm. If I’m tired before then, I am to go to sleep.

So as it’s a new year, Miss Adira wanted to take our dynamic further, we both wanted her to go stricter, she wanted to add more restrictive rules, like Daddy choosing my clothes for the day, choosing my meals, telling me if I’m allowed booze or treaties. I told her I was very happy to have more, so we spent the next few days discussing possible new rules. Set so many hours watching TV, Should I ask to watch TV, Should I ask to watch the particular programme.

In the end we finally got some new rules set.

  1. Ask to sit on the furniture when we are together as a group or just us.
  2. Ask permission to use the toilet. (If no response in time to be determined) then consider permission is granted.
  3. 6 hours of TV per day – time can be earned or deducted, if deducted then Miss Adira will notify ma about what can be done instead in the time deducted. This goes from 8am to 5pm. From 5pm – 8.45pm it’s Master’s choice of TV. If I’m up in the night, I may watch unlimited TV of recorded programmes only, until 8am.
  4. Permission to speak to be asked for. When in the group, ask to speak once for the time together. When it’s just the 2 of us, ask every time.
  5. Permission to be asked for what colour I will dye my hair.
  6. To play with oneself to learn how to make myself squirt, twice a week, videoed.
  7. I am to keep a butt plug and jingle balls in my handbag all the time so at anytime Miss Adira can tell me to go and put either in and video doing it.
  8. Improve on etiquette, good manners, behaving ladylike and courteous to others. Addressing people correctly, waiting for everyone to get their food before eating, not talking over people, opening the door for someone, when passing a drink in a cup ensure the handle is facing them.
  9. Months when chapters of MissAdita’s book is to be written are – February, April. June, August, October and December.

 

My first experience with the jiggle balls was on Monday. I was going to a ballet at the theatre, Miss Adira had told me to go to the toilets in the interval and put the jingles in, videoing it as well. I asked if she would mind if I did it when we first get to the theatre as I don’t go to the toilets in the interval, the queue is always far too long. She said that was fine.

We arrived with plenty of time, so I headed to the disabled toilet, got me phone out and put it in a place where he would be able to see a bit. I had no lube so I put a little bit of soap on it. Well could I put the darnn thing in……no I could not. Huffing and puffing it was not easy, my right foot up on the toilet. I could not shove the thing in. I could hear people outside, there was a queue now. So I tried my left leg up on the toilet, see if that works. No, this way was even worse. All the while I talked to Miss Adira quietly so no one else could hear me. After 3 minutes, I thought I can’t be in here any longer, I had to give up. So I told Miss Adira that this was a complete fail for my first go, maybe I was rushing in the public toilets. I didn’t understand it, I’ve put them in many, many times, I was going to have to figure it out over the next few days at home. Miss Adira said the video was the funniest thing she has watched in a long time, listening to you huff and puff, talking quietly, struggling coz you had all your clothes bunched up, it was hilarious. I’m surprised my mother-in-law didn’t ask why I was all flushed, because I must’ve been.

Two days later I felt like I’d been fisted for hours, I felt bruised and battered around my happy spot, I presume from trying to put the jiggle in. After I’d done my homework, I had time to video part 2 of the jiggles as I am now calling it. Finding somewhere to put my phone, I sat down this time, one leg up on the stool, then just as I pressed record and began, the phone fell down, this repeated about 3 more times. Before I stopped the video, thinking about where I can go and put the camera before I call time again. Surely that wasn’t going to happen again. I sorted myself out, changed position, sorted my phone out, ready for the restart of part 2. I began again. Lubed up, I pushed the first ball in but it popped out, I pushed it back, trying to push the second ball in but as soon as I took my finger away, the darnn thing popped out again. I was beside myself now, why wouldn’t the flamin thing go in. I felt relaxed but by the God, I seemed closed up tight. Trying over and over I was losing patience. That’s it, I’m done today. Epic fail, part 2.

The next day after I had a shower, I spent some time having a little play, following the rules Miss Adira had set, trying to make myself squirt, I had to video it so Miss Adira could see if I squirted or not. Anyway that didn’t happen, but I did enjoy the play. So I decided to try Part 3 of the jingles again now I was lubed up and spread open a bit from using my fav rabbit. Still lying on the bed, I pushed the first ball in easily, (why was it so difficult before) the second ball went in with a bit of a shove. Pushing them right up there though, was a bit difficult. My fingers aren’t long enough to reach, I did think about using my rabbit to push it further up lol, but then after another thrust up, it stayed in place. Finally I had done it, I can’t believe it took 3 goes to do it. We have little sachets of lube we bought if we went to the swingers club, so I have now put some in the bag with my jingle, so at anytime Miss Adira tells me to put it in, I’m prepared. I just hope I don’t have to lie on the public toilets floor to put it in all the time though.

Anyway I finally did it for Miss Adira and kept it in until my afternoon nap, she was very pleased and amused by the latest video, so I was pleased I had made her proud of me and for me myself, well I was proud of myself because I really couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t do it, I was determined to do it and I did. Plus they felt darnn good too. I put a little bounce in my step to feel the balls jingle inside me……..mmmmm I like them.

An evening with my Doms/Domme on Saturday night.

Evening with Master, Daddy and Miss Adira, last Saturday.

Arriving later than planned, I had to say hi to the petting zoo first before giving Miss Adira a hello kiss. She looked very sexy in a tight black skirt, a black vest top with a purple bra showing underneath. Sitting next to her on the sofa was her new wooden spoon. I had a sneaking suspicion it was out for me.
The night before, as usual I was very tired, and you all know by now what happens when I’m tired. I become a major brat.
I hadn’t had a nap, so Miss Adira told me that apparently she went off her head, flew off her chair to go to him, and went mad, she was furious. Daddy said, Even I would never ever whatever her. It’s like a death wish. That’s when I realised I was in trouble.
So the spoon was for me. And she wanted to use it straight away. She made us all a coffee, Master put his YouTube on and I was instructed to go into the kitchen. Now C, their son was home, the kitchen window open, so I was told I had to be quiet. Bent over, skirt up I leant on the windowsill. At first she started by telling me she would not accept anyone whatevering her, had Daddy told you about the guy at work ? I said, erm yes, I realised then that was one thing you would not tolerate.
She asked me to pick a number, can’t remember the numbers she told me but I went with 2, I think. She thought for a minute and said 40. I’m sure she just picked a number out of the blue. We will do them in sets of 10, she said.
I’ve not had fun or punishment spankings for quite a while so that first whack stung like crazy. Fortunately she let me grab my butt on quite a few occasions before saying, I don’t allow fidgeting do I ? No sorry. I stuttered. A quick break after the first 10 and she did the next 10. I think I managed to stay still’ish, I can’t remember. on one occasion it was so hard I blurted out, OW SH*T. Did you just swear then ? She asked, amused. Don’t you have a rule with Daddy that you are not allowed to swear ? I looked at her, my eyes pleading, don’t make me tell Daddy, please.
Another break, Right I think we will count now, for every even number, I’m sorry Miss Adira, for every odd number, I will tell Daddy that I swore. Of course by the time she finished telling me, I’d forgotten it all. So she went through it again. Of course the first swat came, the pain made my head go blank, and I forgot what to say. Luckily Miss Adira knows what I’m like for forgetting it, so she helped me out, then I got the hang of it. Then the next 10. Each swat taking my breath away.
I have always said this but I do find it infuriating that your pain threshold drops when you aren’t spanked regularly. And this was bad. But Miss Adira doesn’t play around during a spanking, play is very hard, punishment, even harder. There is no other way.
Finally the 40 was over, I stood up ready to give Miss Adira a kiss, Erm it’s not finished, your getting a maintenance spanking. Being a submissive herself, though she is not as bratty as I am, she knows the need, want, desire for a regular spanking. She also knows my behaviour only gets worse when I don’t get either a maintenance or play spanking. And she knows I’ve not had either for a few months.
She pointed back to the windowsill, I bent over, arms by the window. Then she began, taking my breath away again. Trying the other side of the spoon, it made a thunderous sound but she didn’t like that much. So she went to the utensils pot and picked out a rubber spatula, the first hit with that and I nearly jumped through the window. Oh you like this one, I musta picked the wrong one for your punishment. She said, I could hear a smirk in her voice. She went from spoon to spatula, not sure how many I got, but I know my butt felt bruised and very tender. She asked me to bend over further so she could aim for my sit spots, she loves to get them, she knows you feel it for longer there. But I’ve got to admit, it was a very familiar, very nice feeling, once the spanking pain ended of course. Kisses and cuddles followed with a knowledge of her forgiveness and my knowledge of never, ever saying whatevs to her again.
The next part of the evening was great, we were going to order pizzas but lord were they expensive when you buy sides along with pizzas, so we decided on chinese. I phoned Daddy, asked him what he wanted and could he pick it up on the way home from work, as he was leaving work now. He said Phone the order through, tell them we will pick it up for 6.30pm, I will come home, get changed and pick you up, so you can come with me. So I wrote everyone’s order down, phoned and ordered, soon Daddy arrived, got changed, then it was near enough time to go, so we left, as usual it was very busy but phoning the order was much better as we have been known to be there 45 minutes before we got our food. But it is a very nice chip shop, so no wonder it’s always busy.
Daddy wasn’t very chatty in the chippy, I think he was very tired, had a very busy day, not eating of course wouldn’t have helped, to which I told him off. You are allowed a lunch break, in fact it’s against the law not to have your breaks so please do not do that again. No breakfast, no lunch, is not good for you. I told him. He tried to brush it under the carpet but I said, If I had done that, you wudda been furious with me, he nodded, So please think about your health, food and breaks are important. I finished the lecture then. I had to own up about swearing earlier, so I quickly told him about my spanking and swearing. He wasn’t happy but he didn’t say much.
Getting home we all sat and enjoyed our meal, watching FaceOff. Doesn’t matter how many times I’ve watched it, it’s one of my favs, John Travolta looking damn sexy as normal and Nicholas Cage, who plays a mad man excellently, but who I also find very attractive, but that accent of his, omg it’s so sexy. Looking it up online, I found it’s a Californian accent, excellent film and actors, which are very pleasing on the eye.
Then we watched Paris With Love, I was feeling more tired so must admit I dozed quite a bit. Miss Adira wanted to give Master a massage so went to get some baby oil. She was a little drunk so was becoming a bit more pushy. She asked if I told Daddy about me swearing, I said yes, and what did he say, she asked, I said not much. She looked at Daddy as if to say what are you doing ? You’re letting her get away with swearing ? But Daddy seemed oblivious. A bit later, she said that she thought Daddy should have a massage, again he seemed unaware of the conversations going on around him. I was too tired to give one anyway, but she told him again. Eventually, she just told him to take his top off and get a massage, She passed the baby oil to him, so he went to pass it to me, I just said No, I just wanted to sleep. Feeling Miss Adira’s eyes on him, he said it again, this went on for a few minutes until he went upstairs to get some paddles. Then asked me again. I was close to shouting at them all, but just said no. Right stand up right now, he said firmly, I I kept refusing, until he told me again, the voice came out, you know you’ve pushed too far when the voice comes out. So I stood up, he wanted me to bend over the settee, but I hate getting a spanking in front of everyone, so I asked if we could go in the kitchen as it was really hot in the living room. He agreed so I ended up bent over, holding onto the windowsill once more. He had brought down the hard leather hand paddle and a paddle similar to a vampire paddle. Both are seriously hard and I don’t like either. Daddy certainly wanted to make a point, I’d embarrassed him in front of the others. Well someones already made a mark on your backside, was this Miss Adira’s work ? He asked. Yes I muttered. Then he began, and like Miss Adira’s punishment, he wanted me to remember this one and there was no messing about. At one point I felt his toes over my left foot, I wondered why, until I started fidgeting. Then he put a little bit of weight down, so I couldn’t move my foot and leg, then I couldn’t try to get away. It was actually a good tactic, because I am a mover. Though not with Miss Adira coz she is super strict about any movement during any spanking. I had to count the last 10, and after the 10th swat, I got up and went towards Daddy for a hug,  Erm you haven’t finished your count, he said. 10, I told him, my voice sarcastic. Right bend over, don’t speak like that to me. NOW. He ordered. I had to do my count again and I made sure my voice sounded apologetic. Daddy certainly made sure I knew my behaviour was not acceptable. And I certainly felt it.

Back in the living room massages were still being done, I began tickling Daddy’s back, then Miss Adira said, I think you can do Daddy’s massage now. She told Daddy to take his top off, so I gave him a massage. After a while she said, I’m missing out, I want Aurora to massage my back. Daddy moved so DiDi got into his position. I’m partial to my boobs getting a nice massage too, she told me.

Whilst I gave her the massage she asked Daddy to massage her feet. He wasn’t impressed with this, we all could tell she was a bit drunk. She began demanding that Daddy massaged her feet, eventually he gave in, knowing she wouldn’t stop until she got what she wanted. I always enjoy massaging, stroking DiDi’s boobs and I know she loves it.

After some time went by, Miss Adira said I was the only one who hadn’t had a massage, so told Daddy to give me a back and boob massage. Taking her place I took my top and bra off and enjoyed the massage. Then I suddening remembered something.

Oh poo, I’ve not done Miss Adira’s poses or make me smile pic or vid. And It’s not that I’ve not sent them, I had not done them. Master had just got up, I like to do them on my own. So I left it for the time being. I went to bed about 9am, in the hope to get some sleep, never happened but coz I’ve normally done it by now, I never gave it another thought. Now when I next looked over at Master and DiDi, Master was looking at the shoehorn I gave DiDi a few weeks ago. I looked at DiDi, I’ve not sent you my poses have I ? She shook her head, Or make me smile, she said. It’s not that I’ve not sent them, I’ve not done them. I told her, a sinking, sick feeling came into my tummy. So not only did you whatevs me, you’ve not done my poses or my make me smile ? She said. Erm yes, Master got up just as I was going to do them, then I went to bed, I forgot then. I told her. It sounded like a pathetic excuse. Hmmmmm, she said.

Now many moons ago, a good friend on SpankingTube @Ditzy247, would always get a terrible spanking with a shoehorn. She told me she bought them from IKEA. So what do I do, I buy 2 when I next go to IKEA. They’d never been used, which is why I decided Miss Adira would probably enjoy this new toy.

But whilst Miss Adira took the shoehorn off Master, he took it back and said, It’s only fair that you experience this new toy first. She looked at him, No, you’ve not tried all your toys. I think you need to try it though, just so you know how it feels. He told her, standing up. Come on, he said pointing to the settee.  Miss Adira stood up, there was no mention of dropping her jeans so she bent over. Master struck her, it looked hard. No flinch from DiDi. He did it again harder, and again no flinch. A few more harder strikes and I think she eventually gave an ouchie.

Master and Daddy went to the kitchen to sort out what things we were taking home, leaving Miss Adira to say, As you didn’t do poses and make me smile I think 8 with this is enough.  I looked shocked, No please, 6. I replied. 7 then, DiDi told me. You don’t do odd numbers ever though. I whinged. Okay, well 8 then, she said standing up. Waving the shoehorn towards the settee, so I got up, walked to the settee, You know I don’t do over clothes, ever. She said. Throwing a dirty look at her, I lifted my skirt and bent over. The first hit made me gasp and rub my bum, Come on, DiDi said. Doing a lighter one, it was followed by another strong hit. It took my breath away. I understood why Ditzy wanted to hide her shoehorn now. Light then hard, light then hard until the 8 were over. Trust me, these were nice compared to what I got from Sir, she said. 

I’ve now come to the conclusion, firstly, Do Not say whatevs to DiDi, second, Do Not refuse a task from Daddy and lastly, hide or throw out that flipping shoehorn.

 

My sentence.

My sentence.

Miss Adira video called just before 4pm yesterday. We had a quick chat, then she asked if I wanted to know my consequence first or do my spelling. I chose my spellings and was very pleased to get 10/10.

We chatted some more, about general stuff and it felt like Miss Adira was holding onto the suspense for as long as possible. Until I eventually asked what it was.

Then the evil chuckle began, I knew she had thought of something tricky. She said this idea just popped into her head last night, get your notebook ready, I want you to write something down. I waited til she spoke. The first line;

I will not be a brat..   the second line;

I will heed Miss Adira’s warnings.

Then she told to write all the letters of the alphabet going downwards. Showing me what she meant.

A  E I  M Q U  Y

B  F J  N R V  Z

C  G K  O S W

D  H L  P T X

Then she told me to write blue next to the top line, Black on second row, Red next, finally Purple on the last row.

A  E I  M Q U  Y ……BLUE

B  F J  N R V  Z ……BLACK

C  G K  O S W ……..RED

D  H L  P T X ……….PURPLE

So when you write your lines, I want each letter that particular colour. I want 2 pages, no 1 page, 2 sides, every other day for a week. Starting Monday, then Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. I think by the time you’ve finished this, it will have sunk into your brain, not to be bratty with me because you will not get away with it. I huffed, puffed an tutted as I wrote it down, growling at her as she chuckled evilly, a smirk on her face.

We chatted for a bit longer then she had to go back to work.

Later that day I spoke with Daddy about me swearing at Miss Adira. He said right I’ve decided what your consequence will be. I want 10 reasons why you should not use naughty language to my Mistress and 10 reasons why you should not be disrespectful and naughty for your Daddy. These all have to be different reasons. I’ve already been warned that if I continue my knarky brattiness, it will be 20 reasons. This has to be done by Saturday.

Must admit this is a tough one not to repeat the same thing. 

Getting that tingly feeling.

Getting that tingly feeling.

I don’t know about you, but when your Dom says something in that tone of voice, when you should be feeling guilty for doing something wrong, but you just find your bits are tingling with excitement. You want to risk doing it again but part of you says don’t be silly. The other part screams CONTINUE as you feel your wetness between your legs.

There are certain situations where this happens for me, one particular one is when I’m out with Daddy, and I give attitude, cheek etc, Daddy threatens to lift my dress and spank my backside, wherever we are, he doesn’t care. He says, “Carry one, you carry on little girl.” That’s all he needs to say, because I know he would do it. Even if we are in a supermarket, I think he would.

Yesterday we had to go to town, I was with Miss Adira and Daddy. Miss Adira had gone one way, I was searching for something for Master’s dinner. I was going to get a precooked chicken but there wasn’t any. So I went off to look around, until a few minutes went past and I heard in a loud, booming voice, “Little’en get here now,” I blushed as people turned to look at me and look at him, but I felt dampness between my legs and the familiar tingle. Even as I’m writing this I can feel I’m tingling, I half expected him to slap my bum when I eventually went to him, he wasn’t happy that I disappeared, but I was only wandering around the shop, like I do when I go on my own every week. But when I’m with Daddy, he expects me to stay by his side and as I was pushing the trolley to save me using my walking stick, he wasn’t happy because I wandered off without the trolley. So I easily could have stumbled, fallen or strained my back. But that tingle got stronger, sometimes I almost wish to myself that he did actually do it, but then it would be so embarrassing and humiliating, plus he could get arrested for abusing his little, even if he’s not, to the vanilla world, he would be.

There’s another situation that causes this tingle, and this one is with Miss Adira. I tend to be more cheeky, sassy, bratty when I’m talking to her on whatsapp, I’ll be honest, I don’t usually dare to be as bad when I’m actually with her, I would get more than just her normal spanking, she would not stand for it at all. Not sure what she would do if I acted like I do with Daddy sometimes. I don’t think she would slap my backside in public, but then again I could be wrong.

On whatsapp, whilst bratting about going to bed early and she had calmly told me repeatedly that I was and the reason why, I received a voice message from her. It simply said, “Aurora.” Oh my lord did I tingle and leak. But it was a warning enough to stop being naughty. But that simple word, like Daddy’s “Carry on,” is all the warning I need to stop. Yet the tingle becomes so strong I’m really tempted to continue, but I daren’t. I stop and let the tingle wear off and my bits dry up, but I still feel tempted, just to see what happens.

Anyone else get tingles from one word said by their Dom/Domme ?

First major tantrum with Miss Adira.

My first drunken disobedient strop/tantrum with Miss Adira, whilst on our naturist holiday.

In the morning Master and Daddy went to Tesco to stock up on essentials, food, treats and most important booze. We had limited space in the car so could only bring food for one day. Miss Adira and I went for a walk through the fields and woods until we came across one of the ponds. There are lovely pathways all around their land for us naturists to enjoy. A couple of public footpaths were marked off, warning naturists that people may get offended by seeing naked people about so they were avoided. But having found one of the ponds we sat there and chatted. Mostly it was about how we’ve messed up on something so received a punishment or how Miss Adira may write things in a text message only to delete it, saying it’s not worth the risk. Whereas I would just press send coz I was peeved off. We were both very stubborn and pig headed neither of us willing to back down or not have the final say. So far Miss Adira and I had not been in this dilemma, she and Daddy had warned me that I did not want to get on her bad side when our dynamic began because I would not win. I think in my stupid naive head, I believed she wasn’t as bad as they made out. Daddy always said Miss Adira would have me crying within minutes, just by what she has said as she was very clever with her words, again the bratty stubborn side of me really didn’t believe she was that bad. My sensible head believed she was.

So back to our holiday.

Having been drinking wine since lunchtime, I was getting very merry. I’m a bit odd, in the way that if I had wine in a glass, I would drink very very slowly, not really enjoying it, probably only having a quarter of the glass before chucking it out. Now since I became Daddy’s ‘little’ and he puts wine in my sippy cup I drink very quickly and it tastes really nice. Told you I was a bit odd. Before holidays I bought Miss Adira and I some plastic cups with lids and straws as you can’t take proper glasses to the sunroom or hottub. These cups you can put in the freezer to keep your drinks colder for longer.  And I drank wine very quickly out of these cups.

On Wednesday after Master and Daddy had purchased more alcohol I had drunk rather a lot, feeling very merry, well a little bit……no I was pissed. I was enjoying the hottub then floating in the pool. Messing about in the hottub I splashed water over Miss Adira’s face. “I think someone may be getting a spanking for that”, she told me. So what do I do…..yep I do it again, not once but twice. Daddy had a look of sheer shock and horror as he knew she did not like water on her face. “I will meet you upstairs when you come back,” she told me. Being rather drunk I dismissed the comment. When she left Daddy asked me if I had a death wish because he would never, ever splash water on her face coz she would go mental. I didn’t really believe she would be that annoyed by it. Anyway we left the hottub and went to the pool, I was enjoying just floating in the water, holding one of those noodle float things under my head, my body just naturally floated, and for once, my back wasn’t hurting. So I just floated for a long time. Daddy wanted to go back so I told him I was staying in, so he left but he quickly returned because Master had told him, he should not have left his drunken ‘little’ in the pool by herself. Though I kept telling him to go, he said no, and sat in the chair watching me float.

When we eventually returned Miss Adira was there, looking stern, telling me to go to her bedroom. I just flatly said No, I want a shower first. After a few No’s I went to the shower. Miss Adira followed with the hairbrush in her hand. “That’s okay, I wanted to see how it was to spank you when you’re wet. Turn around.” she told me, standing in the doorway of the shower. “No,” I told her, deliberately facing her, over and over and over she told me to turn around, I kept stubbornly saying No. She whacked me a few times with the hairbrush, boobs and sides of my legs were perfect targets but still I refused to turn around.

Writing this now, the following morning, I’m shocked at how I reacted, I’d never do that to any of them if I was sober.

I kept saying, I need to wash my hair, I need to put conditioner on it, I need to wash the chlorine off my body, any excuse to stay in the shower, hoping she would just go. But as she told me many times, she would be there all night if necessary. So I washed myself all the time facing her.

Then the standoff began. Turn around, no. The shower was turned to cold, I turned it to hot again. The shower was turned off, I turned it back on again. I’ve no idea how long we were in there or how many times the shower was altered, but my stubbornness was getting worse and refused to leave. The final time, Miss Adira turned the shower off with a warning not to turn it on, the tone of her voice warned me not to.

After a while I just plonked myself on the floor in the corner, Miss Adira was really pissed off by now. Daddy had made dinner, telling us it was on the table, “Just leave it there,” she called to him then closed the bathroom door and sat in the shower.

Seriously stern lectures followed then, those awful words followed, ‘I’m disrespecting her,’ I told her I wasn’t but deep down I knew I was being very disrespectful. “You wouldn’t do this for Master or Daddy would you?” she asked. “Not anymore no,” I replied. Then eventually my emotions took over, those 3 words were always enough to make my stubbornness dissolve and tears start flowing.

Eventually Miss Adira persuaded me to get up, having had a long chat, I didn’t want to see the boys, I didn’t want to have my dinner, I just wanted to go to bed, but I wasn’t allowed, I had to have my dinner, then I could go to bed. But first we headed to the other loft and had snuggles in bed. I was still upset, and felt embarrassed seeing the boys so Miss Adira said we would have dinner in there, she brought the plates of food in, warmed them up in the microwave then we sat down. She made sure I’d taken my medication and also made sure I ate. If I started just playing with my food she told me off, until I’d eaten half of it.

Miss Adira wanted me to go upstairs and watch a film but I said I really didn’t want to. She knew it was because I felt embarrassed, ashamed, guilty and stupid, well I felt stupid, Miss Adira didn’t think that. Anyway she allowed me to go to bed, gave me my kindle and tucked me in. Giving me a kiss she left me to it, where I lay for a while before finally reading my book. I gave up after a few pages though, nothing would stay in my head and I was still feeling guilty about what happened.

I hadn’t realised but apparently I had fallen asleep, the others heard me snoring from upstairs in the annex.  But as usual I woke up so I read my kindle. Miss Adira popped her head through the door and found me awake, she gave me a hug, asking if I was okay, that’s when I found out I’d been asleep.

In the morning I went to see Miss Adira, we had a cuddle and I sat at the table for a while talking. We were all going to the pool but she said she was happy colouring inside so I went with the boys. Later on I sent her an apology text, saying I was drunk but not that drunk where I didn’t know what I was doing. She replied saying she appreciated the text message, the apology, the explanation but it was all forgotten with now, no further punishments were needed as she had got the desired result, (me crying feeling terribly guilty). She said we both knew there would be a time where this would happen because we were so alike and she knew from her experience that I would test her to this point to see what would happen.

So what have I learnt from this……..I will never win when I’m being disrespectful, stubborn or just flatly being really naughty……..I will never splash water in Miss Adiras face again……I never want to be in that position again, hear those words, see the disappointment in her face.

But as she had said before, it will happen again at some point because we are both so stubborn and pig headed and we would both test and push our Doms/Domme just out of pure devilment. But I hope I don’t test her again for quite some time.

One thing I know for certain is I never want to see the look of disappointment, upset, crossness, (is that a word, oh well it is now) on her face or hear her say I’m disrespecting her or wondering if I really did want this dynamic ever again. Those 2 things hurt me so much more than any severe spanking I’ve ever been given.

The Pack.

Our D/s family has expanded. We are now classed as The Pack.

I spent hours trying to figure out a word or a few words using all the letters from our surnames and the first initial from our first names. There were no names that jumped out at me, I was disappointed, I felt certain I could make a word or two with all those letters, that represented us as a group. Instead Master suggested The Pack, so I’m sticking to that now.

 

You are my DaddyDom, I’m your little baby girl

But your more than that now.

Your my Daddy, I’m your second wife and now I have a sister too.

I broke a promise this made you both upset,

I did a job, taking no thought to how you would feel,

I wanted the job done, not thinking off my back,

It was not an urgent job, it didn’t need doing there and then,

Having had a bad flare up for the past fortnight,

Daddy and J got to witness for the first time my bad days,

Crying on the phone, unable to cope with the pain,

Poor Daddy and J felt helpless, as I cried on the phone.

Master has said many times I should not do these stupid things.

Carrying heavy shopping bags, instead of leaving them until the boys are home.

I’ve been in trouble many times for doing foolish things.

Master knows how to deal with these flare-ups,

It’s been 14 years since I damaged my back,

So Master understands how to help, if he can, so does E.

This is something Daddy and J  will have to learn,

Apart from the obvious, I should not do stupid things.

I need to think first before doing it.

Daddy said “Promise me you will not touch those bottles of pop.”

J told me, “Do not touch those bottles, leave them for E.”

I promised I would not do it, then I broke it.

Thinking I can put them away like how I put my shopping away ,

I confessed to Daddy, whose first thought was come down and thrash my butt !

He was more upset than angry

That I would’ve been so foolish to risk hurting my back more,

He went and told J, who gave me a telling off.

“All we want is for you to be in as little pain as possible,” she said.

We need you to be sensible, taking care of your back,

We are going to worry as you’re family now,

I felt so bad when I saw Daddy look upset,

It made me upset to know I had caused this.

But Daddy and I had a long talk, he told me his thoughts and worries

That if I’d messaged to ask if I could put the bottles away another way,

Daddy may have said okay, if you’ve done it that way before.

I’ve always known I do these stupid things, not as often these days tho

BUT I’ve never realised I’ve been selfish doing this.

Doing my irresponsible actions, which can/do bring on a flare-up,

Not only affects me, my pain, and inability to move,

It also affects my closest family.

Master, E now Daddy and J

So I’m making a promise to think before doing,

To ask for help or wait until the boys are home.

I need to look after my back, which will help my pain levels .

This means I can enjoy the times spent with Master, Daddy and J.

There will always be that worry and concern in the back of their minds,

It will never go away now.

Master and I have just grown accustomed to it,

Daddy has made this the one and only time I disobey him when it concerns my back.

If I dare do it again, he will be round that night and will thrash my ass.

“That’s a promise,” he told me, “He would check with Master that E is not home, then he would be round, and I would not sit down for a week once he’s finished.”

I have no intention on doing it again.

When shopping I will pack fridge and frozen stuff in separate bags, then only bring those bags in, leaving the rest in the car until the boys are home.

Not carry washing baskets up and down the stairs, or make the baskets lighter then do it.

I just need to be mindful of my back, think first, then do the task carefully.

This is a promise to Master, E, Daddy, J and myself, I will try and keep it.