Waiting for my sentence.

Awaiting my sentence.

So last night, well yesterday afternoon too, my mouth got the better of me, I was tired and as usual when I’m tired I get narky, I get bratty and I don’t have a stop button until it’s too late. Plus I don’t tend to get like this to Master or Miss Adira, mainly because I know they will not stand for it. And Master is home with his drawer of toys so by the end of the evening, I’d be in bed early, crying, with a very sore backside. But I would never be this way when I was with them, for the same reason. I feel safe acting out on WhatsApp, silly I know.

Don’t get me wrong, I love a sore bottom, from a fun spanking not from a punishment.

But as life gets in the way, I’ve not had a maintenance spanking in quite some time. The decision made was that Daddy and Miss Adira would join together and give me one on every visit unless they are alone. Then that person does it. But the intention was to ensure I get one every visit. Apparently I’m told, my behaviour becomes much worse without it.

Anyway my usual non sleeping got me really stroppy. But also the bedtime rules get on my nerves a lot. 

So originally, I was to have a snooze, IF I feel tired. Without the snooze, I was to have an early bedtime. 8pm instead of 9pm. Now I know what I’m like, I know I will fight going for a snooze. Also fight the 8pm bedtime. Even though I know it’s for my best interests to have a snooze,  even though I know I should, I need it, I will feel better catching up on some sleep. Yet my head fights the fact why I have to be told to sleep. why can’t it be my choice. Of course I know the answer to this, this is what I chose, what I want and need.

Yet the brat in me wants to choose myself, not be told to go for a snooze like a child. Like the brat I was behaving like now.

Also, it was my decision to ask Miss Adira to amend these rules to ALWAYS have a snooze. Whether for sleep or just rest. It was my decision to say if I don’t have a snooze then I should have an early bedtime. Only Friday and Saturday night didn’t apply, though it was still normal bedtime. Any later in the night and I’m a bad tempered, bratty, cheeky girl.

So back to yesterday…………….

Firstly I was chatting with Daddy on the WhatsApp live thing, having a lovely chat. I was knackered, even though I had a good sleep. He could tell I was, so suggested, not an order, just a suggestion, that I go for a snooze. Well I jumped down his throat, speaking very disrespectfully, rude and disgraceful. Daddy’s face went cold, choosing to end the conversation, knowing if he didn’t then this would become a whole lot worse.

I didn’t speak with Daddy for the rest of the day. I missed his call on the way home.

But I was still in a mood, though I was keeping it away from Master. Miss Adira became the next person to get the brunt of my mood.

It started with Miss Adira asking if all tasks were starting again as I’d been ill the week before.  I replied Yes M’am. Then she asked, Are we going back to no nap…..early bed. I asked if this was open to discussion. ( Even though we’ve had this discussion many times and it’s always stayed set. ) Miss Adira asked what I was proposing. I didn’t know. Why ? Because I was too tired to think about it. She replied, how can we discuss it if you have no proposition. 

I know what I wanted, I wanted this stupid rule scrapped, but I couldn’t say that to Miss Adira. Mainly because I knew I would flip out when she said no.

I was also too tired to do my tasks and I’d been out in the morning, so I was only starting all my homework at 3pm. I’d asked if I could pass on it then saying my head wasn’t working properly, not being honest and saying I was tired. Miss Adira agreed but told me in future I was to ask at the beginning of the day, if I was going to be busy and knew I’d be too tired to do them, not ask at the end of the day. 

Getting in a strop I told her, I didn’t know I would be. But I could do double homework the next day.

She asked again about discussing the bedtime, I said, coz I dont want early bedtimes, saying it just like a petulant child. Another moan from me. Miss Adira told me, tell you what, you do your own bedtime n if your grumpy or tired or anything due to you being tired……it will be dealt with how I see fit. 

That’s not bloody fair, I replied. First warning, watch your tone.

More complaining from me and Miss Adira not budging, I replied, keep to the bloody same then. The following conversation was mainly from Miss Adira,  confirming a snooze every day or early bedtime. And watch your tone.

More bratty conversations until…………

I am not appreciating your tone and language toward me……so my dear tomorrow I will deal with you….and just to put the cherry on your cake I will be forwarding your messages to your Daddy for the bloody comments…..which I do believe he will see as inappropriate language from his little.

My very cheeky reply was, Oh thank you bunches.

I told you to watch your tone. I told her I will shut up for the rest of the day then. Anyway it was safer, I wouldn’t  be digging myself into a much bigger hole. My goodnight video was very short and blunt.

But Miss Adira’s video, well that was very long and firmly said.. No more negotiations for bedtime, snooze every day, bedtime will depend on how my sleep was the night before and whether or not I’ve been bratty due to tiredness. I am to say how I slept in my morning video and at 5pm I am to send a message stating if I’d managed a snooze or not, then she will decide on my bedtime. I can strop, brat, moan about it all I want, but I will NOT win.

Miss Adira will think overnight what the consequence of my brattiness will be, there will be no negotiation on it. And it will be something that will be done on Saturday when we meet or an alternative that will be ” instantaneous “. As I still had consequences due, 1, to give Miss Adira a massage, 2, a punishment spanking was due and also 3, a weekend of me wearing my maids outfit, serving ALL my Doms/Domme for the entire weekend.

I went to bed feeling very guilty, but also very peeved still. I don’t know why I’ve such an issue with bedtime but anyway, I won’t be trying to negotiate again ( yet ), coz you know what I’m like, I will forget about this then do it all again.

Now I’m waiting on Miss Adira to video call, do my spelling test, then discuss my consequence. And hear from Daddy.

Cursing is a habit.

I had no idea how much cursing I do / did before Daddy made this rule of No Cursing from his little girl.

I’m not going to lie, this has been / is a very hard rule as the words slip out before I’ve even realised what I’ve said.

Last night we had a discussion………

Messing with Master whilst he made the dinner, he told me to shove something up my arse………..me being me retaliated and repeated it to Master. This earned me a spanking from him and a discussion with Daddy about the word arse.

Was it a swear word ?

I didn’t think it was, Daddy thought it was.

Then the discussion continued with Daddy asking if I really didn’t think it was a bad word.

I kept saying no, I asked Master and he said it was.

I still didn’t believe him. Until Master produced a list of what was a swear word. And arse was classed as a mild swear word.

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So Daddy asked again.

I said, well I wouldn’t have been allowed to say it when I was a kid. But I guess I will have to accept it’s a swear word.

In truth, I didn’t really think it was a swear word, maybe a bit of a naughty word, but not actually a swear word. Now I know.

I then asked Daddy if I still had to tell him every time I did swear.

He replied, Yes. We agreed on everything and complete honesty.

I said, Oookkkkaaaayyyy.

Have you said something else little minxs ? He asked.

I ignored the comment, I didn’t want to own up.

14 minutes later, he asked again.

Again I ignored the message. My guilt was growing, making me feel sick, worried about the consequences, upset about disappointing Daddy, not owning up, but becoming a bit stubborn, not wanting to own up, so I never spoke to Daddy again.

Until, 56 minutes later when I finally just messaged Daddy.

Daddy replied quickly, asking if I was not speaking to him or if he had upset me.

I told him, he had not upset me.     Let’s face it, Daddy could never actually upset me, I was being a brat and Daddy was more worried about me being upset with him than me being a total brat.

He asked, if I was in a mood. So I said, A guilty mood yes.

Let’s be honest now Little minxs, what have you said ? He asked.

May have said bloody a few times and sh*t to a fly in the house, I told him, I’ll admit I wrote it very sulkily.

But whilst we went through the non speaking period I started looking for something.

A good friend on SpankingTube is writing a second novel, only on the Tube though, I’ve said many times it’s too good not to publish, but she’s just happy to keep it there. She often comes up with some very good ideas, the punishments in her books are Extreme and so are the sex scenes. But one idea she came up with made me think. Here’s the scene in the book briefly, the Dom was away, whilst his sub and daughter remained at home. He has secret cameras all over the house, and caught his sub breaking a rule. She had to self spank harshly, whilst he watched then when it was dinner time, she was to take her red spikey mat and sit on it during dinner. He watched making sure she put her bare bottom fully on the mat.

So this got me thinking, you all know by now I watch a video or read something, that sounds really nasty, I end up buying something as similar to the one I had just seen or read. And I thought the idea of a spikey mat may stop my bad language.

So I looked up online if there was something that could work. I found this.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Yogi-Bare%C2%AE-Acupressure-Massage-Wellness-Relaxation/dp/B018QQ4WO4/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8-2id=1534445239&sr=8-2&keywords=spikey+mat

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It is long, 74cm-43cm, but you could either just drape it over a chair, hoping no one will spot it or fold it in half. Daddy has already told me I’m to sit bare on the chair when we go out for our meal, so I imagine he will just say drape it over the chair to give me total humiliation.

I showed Daddy, telling him this could be an idea that will help me break this swearing habit. If I ordered it there and then, it will arrive on Saturday so hopefully arrive before we leave to go to Daddy’s.

As usual, I’m sure I will end up wondering why on earth I showed Daddy and why on earth I ordered one.

By the time it was ordered I was late going to bed, so I had to do a quick goodnight message to him and a sorry.

He replied, telling me he wasn’t cross but was upset that I didn’t own up straightaway.

This got me feeling so guilty and upset, I’d disappointed him and it’s the last thing I’d ever want to do, for Daddy or Master. I went to bed and hugged Little Minxs teddy, tears filling my eyes.

For me words hurt a lot more than a spanking. I went to sleep feeling awful, woke up feeling the same.

We did our good morning messages, I told Daddy I felt very guilty and upset, I admitted I swore no more than 4 times on both days, I’d deserve and except my punishment and will try extra hard to stop swearing.

Daddy replied, saying, he still loved me and was still proud of me because he knows I am trying. With regards to my punishment, instead of wearing my bite gag, during my 45 swats with the jokari paddle, I will have a bar of soapy soap in my mouth instead.

 

So it’s all forgotten, I’m going to try super hard today, well all the time, Daddy is still proud of me for owning up, even if I didn’t there and then, but the main thing is, Daddy is okay, we will video chat at lunch time, mainly because I just needed to make sure he had forgiven me, even though he’s said it in the messages.

So my spanking will be horrendous and going for the meal will be even worse as my tender, raw skin sits on those spikes. But if it makes me stop then it’s worth the pain.

I know Daddy reads my blogs so I’m making a formal apology to him.     Daddy, I’m really sorry for saying those curse words, and even more sorry for not admitting it like I’ve always done in the past. I’m sorry I upset you but deserve the punishment and I will take it the best I can. I will try much harder not to swear, Daddy. I promise. XXXXXXX

 

Here’s the chart Master found online about all the swear words used and what grade they are, I will say I didn’t know some of the words listed. But I don’t intend to use any of them.

 

Blogging A – Z Challenge = L

Blogging  A – Z Challenge = L

L = Lines.  

These darn lines entered my life as soon as we started our D / s dynamic and I hated them.  Three sides of an A4 notebook, written in pencil, neatly, no spelling mistakes, then photograph them with the date written in pen, sent to Master, every day.

For the first few months, I remember Master would get up for work and find me writing my lines, having a chuckle to himself as he watched me, I didn’t think 3 years later I would be still doing them.

The amount of pages changed, once Master wanted me to do more chores, the lines were reduced to 2 sides.

Unless of course I get punished for something, then he may add more.

Me being the brat I am have found ways of still being bratty, I knew Master never really looked at them, so one time, I wrote the first few lines backwards on each page, another time I was dared by another bratty sub friend I have on SpankingTube, to write my own sentence, with one or two swear words in it.

And of course, I felt guilty afterwards so confessed my sins.

Master already knew what I had done and waited until I owned up.

I know my punishment for the backwards incident was to write the lines every day backwards, which when writing pages of this sentence was quite hard and took a bit of concentration.

The other incident earned me more lines plus a mouth soaping.

But that was a long time ago. Now I just get on with them, 2 sides don’t take long, unless I get more.

 

Last night earned myself double lines, as I discovered this morning. For the usual issue, my arguing. Let me explain….

I’ve no sat nav built in my car so we bought a phone holder months ago, but the position of it wasn’t right. I have been asking since then, if Master could buy me another phone holder. If I’ve needed the phone for sat nav, I’ve ended up holding the phone so I can see the screen. Not good if I got stopped by the police. About 4 months ago, I bought tickets for a concert in Manchester. So I would need the sat nav, I started to ask more frequently, still nothing, then after more nagging, on Tuesday, Master and I went to the car to see what I needed. He had another holder like the one that’s already in the car so we tried that in other places but it’s no good as the phone is too heavy so hangs down or drops off. Going back in the house, Master went on Amazon Prime and bought one. It arrived last night, so as Master was away, E set it up, but he wasn’t very impressed with it, saying he thought it would just fall off. So I wanted to order a different one, just in case it’s rubbish. Asking E to find one, he just kept telling me what it was like, until I just said, find me the one to buy and send me the link. Meanwhile I told Master what E had said, asking him to buy the one E suggested. He wanted me to wait and try the first one in the car first, but as time was ticking by I just wanted to order it, we can send the other one back. Between Master and E, I was quickly becoming in a mood and getting stroppy, not because I couldn’t get my own way, just because they couldn’t just understand why I wanted to order one. If these are no good, we will have to look elsewhere, which meant a day to order, a couple of days to arrive before I need it on Wednesday. Master is out all day Saturday and away again next Wednesday, meaning less time to get it sorted.

On my last message last night, I ranted, then said I was going for a shower then going to bed before I start to say something I shouldn’t. This morning I discovered I had double lines for arguing. I tried to reason with Master by making him understand why I wanted to order the other one, but he said I should not have argued, and unless I wanted treble lines, I was to stop arguing. I will be honest, I still tried to get him to understand. But I won’t mention it again. Master is in work and doesn’t need me sending messages all day. So I will just do the extra lines.

 

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