Our first week as Domme/sub.

Our first week as Domme/sub.

It’s been a really good week in our new dynamic, I had been really good following my tasks, making sure everything was getting done. New tasks were added, more maths homework to help with the maths I do with Daddy and I now do spellings a week. Midweek I have a mock test for each subject, Miss Adira marks it and makes a note so when I have my proper test at the weekend, I should get a better mark.

Only when I was talking to my good friend LittleM, who is in a Daddy/little, Mummy/little dynamic, did I think of another rule she may do. And that was to eat healthily, properly and follow fitness pal. LittleM’s new Mummy had just done a new rule about how many sweeties she is allowed a day. She went mad as she was only allowed 3.

Having this run around my head, I decided to ask if Miss Adira was going to monitor my snacks, choccie and sweets. She said “Funny you should mention that, I was going to make it a rule in the near future”, I spluttered, “Are you gonna stop me choccie?” horrified at the thought. “No, maybe limit treats, then if you’ve had good meals and drunk your water then you could have a treat”. She told me. “You’re gonna check my water too?”  I gasped. “You got me started……”she said. Stroppily I replied, “Do I get a say in this?”

This is where Miss Adira is good with words, she replied, “I’m kinda hoping you do….and it goes something like……Yes Miss Adira I will eat more regular, fill in fitness pal and evidence that I’m drinking enough water…….Thank you Miss Adira for then saying if I do this I can have some sweet treats.”

“I…….I…….uuuggghhhhh” I replied. This I’m learning is not the correct response.

“I’m waiting. You have until 14.00…….. to say what I’m waiting for….” She told me. I still refused to say what I knew she was wanting.

A 14.00, she messaged “Really !!!!!! Ignoring me now. Not advisable.” She warned. “I’m not ignoring you.” I told her.

“Well I’ve not had a reply and it was time sensitive…..”She replied back. Sulkily I said “I’ve not done a reply coz I’m in a mood about it.” “Ah okay…..well this next bit is really gonna solidify this mood. I want you to go upstairs and write on your body “I will not sulk at Miss Adira” from your boobs down to your knees. Then go downstairs, get 3 ice cubes and put them up your bottom and stand in the corner for 20 minutes in your pose…….then take pictures and share them with your Master and Daddy explaining what you have done to upset me. Oh you have to pose naked And the writing is to be in permanent marker.” I groaned in my head but still went and did it.

Once I had done my punishment I felt more open to talk about starting a healthy living plan. Miss Adira didn’t understand why I kicked off, I’ve said before I wanted to lose weight, but Miss Adira never said healthy meals, she just wants me to eat regularly, which I do, drink more water and have my sweetie/choccies intake monitored, but she never said no treats at all.

I asked “Is this to go in the rules and tasks?” she said “Yes” . This will include a weekly weigh-in on a Monday. Ideally she wants me to drink at least 2 bottles of water, I’ve measured my cup and it takes 250ml of water so my coffee intake will be included as its decaffeinated. But she still wants me to drink at least 2 bottles of water. She said she will reinforce this rule by making sure 1 bottle is drunk before lunch and 1 before dinner or I may find myself drinking someone’s wee instead. Guess I’m gonna have to try harder with this rule.

Miss Adira wanted to understand what peeved me about this whole thing, I said “Just being told to start better eating, and told to drink more”. She said “Is it not the fact that I’ll be monitoring it and that means you will have to try harder than you usually would.” ( Oh she knows me so well. ) “Probably a bit of that”, I said.

We then changed the topic, my punishment was done, Master found it very amusing then later that day I apologised to her.

That day she chose my 10 spellings to learn and also said I had my 3 times table to learn. I would have mock tests Wednesday and Thursday then the proper tests on Saturday and Sunday. This weeks are relatively easy but I’m to write the words out on 2 lines and write my times table 9 times. My first mock tests went really well, I got them all right. Next week Miss Adira said she would give me much harder words to learn.

After only a few days in this dynamic, it just feels so natural and I love being more involved with Miss Adira. She’s very dominant, and when we did my mock tests, she was sat in her office at work, wearing a shirt and tie, I really felt my submissive side as I did my test. And I loved it.

We discussed the punishment she gave me from the day before, she wanted to know if it was too soft….too harsh……not what you expected. I told her “It was exactly how I thought it would be”. Miss Adira said “There wudda been more but I decided at it was your first infringement I wouldn’t be too strict”.

We were going to have our first day together on Friday and I can’t wait. It will be just a nice gentle day, watching a film, having cuddles, maybe a play, maybe a fun spanking, if I’m a good girl.

Unfortunately my sleep pattern fell to pieces again because I started to wake up at 2am, and what happens when I’m tired….I get moody, grumpy and bratty. Miss Adira had been sending me for naps every day but even though I was nodding off downstairs, by the time I went to bed I was awake again. But if I’d stayed on the settee I wouldn’t of slept either.

On the Tuesday Miss Adira told me I had to have an early night, bed at 8pm. I wasn’t happy with this and I hadn’t had chance for a nap. I repeatedly asked if I had to go to bed early, she video called me to ‘discuss’ my bedtime. She told me I could stay up BUT if I started to nod off or I decide to go to bed early then I will be going to bed at 7.30pm for the rest of the week. (She didn’t think I’d be able to stay up). She said, have a chat with Daddy whilst your thinking about it but I want an answer. Daddy then decided to just set a 7.30pm bedtime. Miss Adira said to him, “You can’t override my decision?” “Oh I can, I’m her Daddy, she’s been up since 2am, she’s had no nap so she’s going to bed at 7.30pm.” looking at me, I knew I had no choice but I wasn’t happy.

But, this little incident turned me on, I loved the fact that

Daddy decided to override Miss Adira, that’s how it should be but it was just so sexy, so hot to hear him say I can override your decision because I’m her Daddy.

So that was it, 7.30pm bedtime. During the day I’d been chatting with our spanko friends and I disrespected Miss Adira. Instead of writing Miss Adira, I just called her she. Which sounded really awful, when I looked back at the sent message. I felt really guilty so I confessed.

Much to my surprise her reaction wasn’t what I expected. I thought she was going to Skype or video call me as soon as she read the message, and really tell me off. Instead she firstly appreciated my acknowledgement that I was disrespectful, as she knows I get like this when I’m tired. But then she told me, “This was something I would not tolerate especially when it’s down to tiredness, yet when I try to give you an early night you just strop about it”. But she decided I needed some contemplation time to think about how I should respect my Miss, even if I’m in a grump. “So I want you to have 30 minutes contemplation time, once, dressed before lunch and once, naked before dinner, until Friday. Sitting on your stool, no TV, no music, no tablet, no distraction. I want you to think about how you should respect Miss Adira and how I only do things for your wellbeing and to ensure you are the best you can be.”

A few days later I was chatting with DaddyW, our spanko friends from across the pond, he told me to tell Miss Adira that she needed to be much stricter with me, I never told her until he asked if I had, when I said no he said, “Well I suggest you go and tell her”. I immediately did as I was told. Miss Adira asked “Why would he say this?” I said “He knows me very well, and known me for a good few years. He knows I need very strict discipline, rules, tasks and love”. “Ahhhh right okay” she said, thinking about what I’d said.

Miss Adira and I chat everyday whilst she is at work, she checks what I’m doing and how much water I drink. On the mention of water I replied “Uurrrrrrrr you’re frustrating”.  Miss Adira was not impressed with this comment. “Drink some water NOW”. She told me, her voice had changed, a sharp sternness was there. Yet she replied, telling me she was laughing. Then I got this…….

“5 pages front and back, saying Miss Adira is not frustrating…… by 9.22am tomorrow.” As usual I argued about it, asking why. She told me, “I simply told you to drink water because you’re dehydrated not hungry.” I sulked for a while, deliberately doing other things. Miss Adira was waiting for the appropriate reply, which was not gonna come for a few minutes coz my stubborn head wouldn’t let me.  “Do I need to put a timer on?” she asked. “What for?” I said. “Waiting for this”, she said highlighting the appropriate comment. I wasn’t sure what the timer had to do with it but I was sure it would be something unpleasant for me, so I gave in and said “Yes Miss Adira”. “Now let’s think about your bedtime tonight, I think 8pm today”. She told me. “Yes Miss Adira”, I replied again. Thinking there’s no point to arguing or moaning about it.

That evening I sat writing my 5 pages of lines, I wanted to get as much done as possible so in the morning there wasn’t loads left to do. I’ve decided I need to think before I speak or type messages. Miss Adira had shown me the correct meaning of frustrating, which implied the ideas were annoying and she made me angry,  this was far more disrespectful than referring to her as ‘she’. But I’d never be angry with her, Master or Daddy, I was just peeved. I think I’m going to have to think before I speak in future.

The next day I’d got all my homework done early as I was up at 2am. I needed to go to town for a few things then go to Tesco to get some groceries, whilst I was in Tesco I received another message. “Forgot to say, lines by same time tomorrow, so 9.22am”. “Eh what lines ?” I asked. “Please turn your notebook upside down and write Miss Adira is kind, caring and loving, in colour please”. I stopped dead when I read this, I chuckled and smiled, I knew this wasn’t the end. “You want me to turn the pad upside down, and write that in the space that’s left on the lines, what all 5 pages again ? I……….” I stopped talking and just sent…I will keep my mouth shut emojis. “Thank you Aurora”. She replied.

Chuckling, shaking my head I had nearly finished my shopping but my back was killing me. I wanted to take a picture of something to make Miss Adira smile. I headed to the cucumbers, picked one with a very wide girth then took a selfie holding it. I wrote on the picture, what should I do with this ? Then sent it to Miss Adira. By the time I was home, I could hardly move.

I asked Miss Adira if I had to do my contemplation time, thankfully she said no but add a day to the sentence. “So none today. But you’re here tomorrow.” I told her. “I’ll say do Monday and Tuesday next week then that will cover all the days you are owed”. She said. “Yes Miss Adira”. I told her.

I’d had a burning question I’d wanted to ask for a few days but kept chickening out. “Can I ask 2 questions please?” I asked  “Could I have my cuddily with me when I see you and could I have her when you spank me?” “Why would you like your cuddily with you then?” Miss Adira asked. “Comfort when you spank me whether it’s fun or punishment.  I just want my cuddily with us”. I explained. “I’m happy for you to have your cuddily”, she told me. “Thank you Miss Adira, it’s funny I feel my little coming out with you. I like that.” I told her. “Do you think its coz I’m more strict ? I like the soft tender moments, you lying on my lap, me brushing your hair, or cuddle times”. She told me.

I think Miss Adira will be my mummy/teacher/Domme in one. Though neither of us want her to be a mummy, but a bit of all 3 would be good, I like that idea a lot. We were both looking forward to our first spanking session too.

Later that evening she messaged me, “So I’d like a video of you playing with the cucumber. I want it sent to me as I leave the house to come to your’s tomorrow.” She told me. “Yes Miss Adira,” I replied.

I wonder what tomorrow will be like, I cant wait.

New story for Miss Adira.

Friday 15th March.

Miss Adira put in my tasks to write either an erotic story or poem, to be sent to her by Friday 6pm. I decided to write a story, based on a Domme/sub dynamic as I’ve never done this before. I now try to write 1 A4 side a day. Miss Adira has told me to post it daily so here’s what I’ve written so far. There’s no title yet, I’ve asked Miss Adira to choose one. I picked Dakota’s name because that was one of the names we liked when choosing Miss Adira’s name and Stephie seemed like a cute submissive name. Please let me know your thoughts or ideas on continuing the story, it’s something I really enjoy doing and keeps my mind occupied and away from my chronic pain.

Chapter 1.

Stephie strained her ears, trying so hard to hear her but the music playing in her headphones prevented to hear anything but beautiful classical music.

She was naked, her arms up, tied to a harness thing on the ceiling, she was stood on two step stools, spread wide, again tied to a harness thing on the floor, like a St Andrews cross, except she was in the middle of the room. That bit she knew.

Dakota had explained she would be tied up for as long as she wanted, she would do what she wanted to her, there was nothing stopping her, except the safe word. Something Stephie hadn’t said yet. Dakota doubted she ever would say it.

Stephie felt cold air blow towards her, causing goosebumps to appear on her skin, she really wanted to rub herself warm.

Suddenly she felt something cold, hard and sharp. Dakota slid the cheese grater across her body, going harder over her ample boobs, harder again over her sexy hard posterior. Dakota spread open one cheek, grating the grater over her most sensitive area. Stephie gasped, trying to move away but she couldn’t. A hand snaked around to her breast, squeezing, teasing her nipple, Stephie groaned in desire, as fingers continued playing with her nipples. Dakota turned the grater around and slapped her butt, Stephie gasped as Dakota continued to paddle her butt cheeks, but still playing with her boobs.

Dakota pushed her front forwards a bit, her butt jutted out, giving Dakota a chance to aim at her sit spot and thighs. She smiled as she heard Stephie cry out, her pretty face screwed up in pain then she walked away.

Stephie lifted her head up, sensing her Mistress was no longer there. Secretly she was thankful for the break, her burning bottom tingled, crying out to be rubbed but she couldn’t. Silent tears were soon swallowed up by the blindfold, tightly tied around her head. Dakota always restrained her tightly, but Stephie only ever tried to get out of them once and she would never do it again.

( One day I may tell you what happened, but for now we will continue with the story. )

Sephie used this break to meditate for a while, knowing full well that the play session was nowhere near being over and she feared what Dakota had planned. After a few minutes meditating, Stephie felt in control of herself again, standing tall of the stools. There was a cold breeze in the room. She suspected Dakota had turned the fan on again, goosebumps went up her arms, making her shiver.

Dakota was watching Stephie on her phone, there was a hidden camera facing her, well actually there were cameras all over the house, even the bathroom. She wanted to know what Stephie was doing at all times, as she was a brat.      

Saturday 16 March.

Stephie felt like she had been tied up for hours, she was cold but her bottom still burned and smarted. She began fidgeting, knocking her knees, wriggling her bum. She was bored and really needed a wee, she couldn’t cry out to Dakota. She began humming, knowing she wasn’t allowed but she was so bored she didn’t care.

Dakota watched as she drank her coffee, her face showed signs of anger but she waited, drank her coffee then headed back. Stephie needed punishing for this lack of respect. Stephie felt the air change, immediately she stopped humming and stood up straight. Suddenly she felt her bit gag go into her mouth, she instinctively opened it, accepting this intrusion which was then tied tightly. She must have heard me singing, Stephie thought. Turning her head left and right in the hope of hearing something, but she didn’t.

Dakota picked up the alcatraz strap, held it firmly in her right hand, her left hand held the end of the long leather tail. It was an evil strap, the holes in it cut into the skin and the leather bruised and whipped away at the skin. Feeling like a layer of skin was flayed away with each stroke. Dakota walked around Stephie, who was still attempting to hear or see something, anything. Just not that strap as Dakota whipped her bottom, once, twice, ten, twenty times. Stephie screamed into the gag, tears flowed quickly into the blindfold. She tried begging but it came out muffled. Moving to the other side of Stephie, Dakota raised the strap once more, hitting the back of her legs, then her upper back, one after the other, twenty, thirty times. Turning around she whipped the front of her legs and across her pelvic area. The length of the strap meant it tailed around too, so it wrapped around her legs and hips. She didn’t care how loud she screamed, she knew she wasn’t allowed to move or speak or scream yet she carried on like the brat she was. Secretly Dakota was amused by this,she wasn’t surprised how much she fidgeted, she had been there an hour already. But the had only just started, now this particular punishment was over.

Dakota put the strap down and picked up a burning candle. She walked back to Stephie, carefully moving the candle around her body, watching how her body flinched away from the heat of the flame. Waving it under her breasts, nipples, happy spot and bottom. She smiled to herself as a drop of hot wax fell over her breast, it dripped down before hardening. Stephie gasped, shaking her head as Dakota let drops fall over her other breast, over her raw back and sore bottom. Stephie shrieked then, she felt the flame wave over her happy spot, pausing as the flame flicked over her clit. Stephie suddenly pushed her bottom away, knocking the candle, sending wax over the floor and over Dakota. She stood quickly and slapped her face hard, twice on both sides. Stephie cried and attempted to say sorry, pleading with her to stop. Instead she let the candle drip over her nipples, making her scream louder, her legs shaking on the stools.

Sunday 17 March.

She had had enough. The leg shaking was always the sign. But Dakota had not finished. Another large drop landed directly on her nipple, then another as Stephie cried out, shaking, trying to twist away. Dakota had had enough, grabbing one breast, she squeezed hard, taking one earphone out, she just said, “ Still,” then put it back. Stephie immediately stopped moving, sobbing quietly, gasping when her breast was let go, eventually DAkota walked away, blowing the candle out. She was not happy with Stephies behaviour at all today, her moving and screaming had ruined her fun, she needed to deal with this now.

Dakota released her from her harnesses, helping the shaky Stephie down from the stools. She removed the blindfold and earphones then released the bit gag. Stephie shook her arms and legs to get the blood flowing again, tears still fell quietly. “ You’ve disappointed me today Stephie, you know you are not permitted to move, wriggle, make so much noise. You’ve let me down, let yourself down. And ruined my play. Now you will be punished for it.” Dakota told her firmly. “ Please Dakota, I’m sorry, please no more, I can’t take any more. “ Stephie pleaded, lifting her hands up to beg but she knew it was a waste of time.

Dakota moved a dining room chair to the middle of the room, “ Come here and kneel on the chair.” Stephie followed her instruction immediately, “ Now lean over and touch the floor, “ pausing for a second before she did it. Embarrassed now as her bottom stuck out and up, knowing whatever was going to happen now, was going to hurt a lot more than what had already happened. Her skin was taught and tight meaning every stroke of a pain implement would hurt like hell. Then Dakota went away for a second, leaving the room before returning with something in her hand. She walked over to the table and began peeling a ginger root, breaking it into two pieces, she quickly, expertly carved each one into a butt plug shape, once satisfied she went back to her naughty sub. Stephie began shaking when Dakota rubbed one ginger plug over her happy spot, noticing how wet she was. Then she inserted that one into her bottom hole, it slid in easily with her own juices over it, the she rubbed the other one all over her happy spot, knowing it would be burning already, then she pushed in into her happy spot hole.

Stephie was already squirming, the heat and pain a piece of root ginger caused was incredible. Satisfied, Stephie was already squirming and uncomfortable, she walked over and picked the dragon cane from her display wall, just as Stephie looked up and saw it. A horrified, pleading look came to her face, Dakota smirked. “ You’ve been a bad girl Stephie, ruining my play is very naughty isn’t it ?” She paused for an answer. “ Yes Dakota, it’s very naughty.” Stephie tried to say more but her voice was shaking too much. “ With each stroke, you are to say, 1, I will not ruin my Mistress’s play. 2, I will not ruin my Mistress’s play.” Dakota said tapping the cane on her crimson bottom.

Monday 18 March.

Stephie was hysterical after the second whip struck across her legs, now Dakota was enjoying herself, she liked to discipline her sub, she expected, demanded perfect behaviour, not what Stephie chose to do today, so she would be taught a harsh lesson. “ Please Dakota, please no more,” Stephie begged and she received another hard whip across her sit spot, she nearly fell onto the floor but luckily she didn’t, that was the last thing she should do. After 30 whips across her crimson backside and legs, Dakota put the cane down.

Gently she helped Stephie up to kneeling on the chair and hugged her tightly, Stephie clung to her Mistress, spluttering I’m sorry over and over. Dakota made soothing noises to calm her down, stroked her hair and back, feeling the welts and across her swollen bottom, she wouldn’t sit comfortably for quite a few days. “Now Stephie, I want you to spend 30 minutes in the corner, standing in your pose then you will go to bed for a nap. Understand Stephie ?” Dakota said quietly. “Yes Ma’am,” Stephie said, moving off the chair and walked awkwardly, painfully to the corner, she put the timer on for 30 minutes then got into her pose. Legs wide, hands behind her back, head bowed. Stephie sniffed throughout her cornertime, her body ached but her bottom felt like there was no skin left on it, the pain was indescribable.

When the timer went off, she turned it off and turned to look for Dakota, there was no sign of her. She had had no instruction from her as to what to do after the cornertime other than have a nap. She was starving and thirsty, so she went to the kitchen, chose a healthy cereal bar, a banana and a tall glass of milk. THen she took them to bed, she decided not to put the television on, just read her kindle until she had eaten. Getting into bed wasn’t easy though, her whole back area was a swollen, bruised, welted mess, the front of her legs were a mess too. Carefully she somehow climbed on the bed and slid on her side so little of her sore area touched the bed. She lifted the quilt over her, flinching as it touched her skin then ate her snack, drank her milk then she felt ready for a nap.

By the time Stephie woke up it was dark outside, looking at the clock, she saw it read 6pm but she didn’t know what time she fell asleep. Trying to move, Stephie let out a little cry, oh she hurt so much, tears sprang to her eyes again. Instead of getting up she decided to just put the telly on for a while. After a few minutes Dakota walked in, “Ah hello sleepy head, you’re finally awake.” She said, climbing on the bed and giving her a kiss. She spotted Stephie flinch, “Sore?” She asked, smirking, “Just a bit, well loads to be honest,” Stephie said looking sheepish. “Right roll over baby, let me look. I know I punished you severely and you understand why I did it, so I hope I don’t have to repeat this ever, or well for a while anyway knowing you.” She chuckled, rubbing her nose on Stephie’s, as she pulled the quilt away.

Dakota wasn’t surprised how she looked, her bottom was swollen almost double. “You’re gonna struggle sitting down for days.” “I know Dakota, but I deserved it,” Stephie said. “You bet you did, but tomorrow because I’m not an awful, evil Domme, you will stay in bed and let me look after you. Let me put some cream on, dinner is nearly ready, we will have dinner in bed, then you can have an early night.”

A new dynamic.

A new dynamic.

Since starting our dynamic with Daddy and PiggyJ 7 months ago,  I don’t think any of us could believe we could improve it. How could we ? What extra could we bring ? What was missing ? There was nothing missing. We were all really happy. But there was something. And it showed up unexpectedly last week.

One tiny message to me, seen by Master and a whole new idea, a new dynamic began to form. The message was simple, it read “Go to bed now.” and it came from PiggyJ, when I said that I was feeling rough with my chest infection. I did as I was told but not before Master saw it and asked “ Are you taking orders from someone else ?” Then he messaged PiggyJ saying “ Are you giving Serf orders, that sounded very Domme then.”

From that moment on, the seed was planted, an idea was forming and for the next 10 minutes or so, Master went from chatting with me to PiggyJ all about a possible new dynamic. He sensed that I thought the idea was quite exciting, she is naturally very dominant, so could it work ? Master said he thought it could be fun but what about when it comes to you playing with her. Knowing my reluctance on going down on a girl, he asked “ What would you do if she said come here and go down on me ? “ I replied that I would have to do it, he told me that it would happen at some point, I had thought about this since that first message but also since we began our play with Daddy and PiggyJ. I had been told that she couldn’t wait to fudge me, which was fine but could I repay the play for her. I had this barrier up about playing with a girl, I wasn’t gay, I never had any desires to play with a girl and I was very honest with PiggyJ from the beginning that I really wasn’t sure I could do that. I could finger her, rub her clit, use toys on her but the actual deed of me going down on her, I didn’t know, I still don’t know that it is something I can do. But I know that if a dynamic formed she would not push too hard, too quickly. She would be more patient than Master would be and more understanding if I just said “ I can’t.”

Anyway Master then left our chat and began working again, leaving us to chat about this possible dynamic. Her first instruction was to find some names I liked for her, they had to have a meaning to them so I went online and searched for quite a long time, finding different names, sending them to PiggyJ until I couldn’t find anything else I liked. She then asked if I had any favourites, I said yes, telling her what I liked best. She then asked if I wanted a name, I replied quickly, “ Yes “ I said. “ Okay well I’d like us to have the same first letter so whatever name I choose for myself, you will have a name beginning with the same letter for your name,” she told me.

We had got down to 2 names, Adira or Eden. She then started searching for names for me. I liked her first choice, Aurora, meaning a mythical Roman goddess of the dawn. So it was decided, her name will be Adira, meaning strong and exotic and mine will be Aurora. Then she said she would like to be Miss Adira from now on.

After a while I got another message of her,  ‘Please send me all your tasks and rules from Master and Daddy.’ I did copy and paste for Daddy’s list but Masters I had to find and go through as many didn’t apply, so he said just tell her the ones you do daily and the rules followed. So I did that, I got a thank you back and awaited what tasks she would implement. I knew she had a devious mind and some of her rules or tasks would leave me baffled.

Now there was only one other person who wasn’t aware of this possible new dynamic, and that was Daddy. I never mentioned it at lunchtime, mainly because I wasn’t sure if it was just talk. The most important aspect of this was it must not impact on what we already have, I did not want to lose any time I have with Daddy, any time we have as a group and I know she felt the same. So when we mentioned it to Daddy, we were adamant that if this happened then we would just stop. I think Daddy was a bit surprised at first, asking Miss Adira how many Doms does she want ? The inevitable burning question I knew was on his mind but he wouldn’t say anything, it was, Am I not good enough for her, is that why she wants more. Am I gonna be pushed to one side and not needed anymore. As a Domme she’s gonna be very very good at it. She will be evil and devious. Her and Master will be much better at it than me.

I made quite a few points then,

  1. It’s not a competition.
  2. Everyone will be different.
  3. There will be 3 different dynamics.
  4. There is not one good way or one bad way.
  5. It’s only for fun, extra fun.

The following day Daddy seemed more happy with the idea, I think he and Miss Adira had chatted more about it at home. As we both continued to tell him that this should not impact on what we have now, that she still wanted time with her Sir, I still wanted as much time as possible with Daddy, plus we wanted time together as a group, so that will not change. Hopefully once he sees this dynamic will just add to the fun we have, I think he will feel more relaxed. She told me that they discussed what tasks she would get me to do daily, punishments and also about starting to do a maintenance spanking on every meet, to be done by both Daddy and Miss Adira. She likes the idea of both of them involved in this and I think it will be good for Daddy.

Finally that morning Miss Adira told me what tasks she would like me to do.

  1. Naked selfie.
  2. Pic or video of doing something to make me smile.
  3. Pose naked and video it. She will choose the pose to do monthly. I was to stay in the pose for 1 minute 42 seconds…….  Yes that precise.
  4. Send a good morning message.
  5. Send a goodnight video.
  6. Weekly…. Write an erotic story or poem, 1 A4 side. To be completed by Fri, 6 pm.
  7. Monthly…..Dressed up, erotic pic, lingerie, hair and makeup done.

Once she had sent them we chatted about each one, she wanted to make sure I was happy with them. I was allowed to go through the poses and tell her the ones I could not do because of my back.

She will never expect anything of me that could endanger me or hurt my back.

Miss Adira’s rules were all connected with bringing my sexy out.

  1. I’m to greet her with a passionate kiss and when leaving. When we are together I’m to touch her more intimately, whether that’s a hand stroking her boob, bottom, inner thigh, happy spot.
  2. She will ask Master if we can go and play, asking the boys if they want to join us or just watch. Or asking if we can get ourselves ready for them.
  3. When we sleepover, she would like us to have a shower together, I will wash her and her hair.
  4. When it’s just us and Master, ( Daddy at work ) she would like her nails painted.
  5. Sick notes can be asked for, with reason why, dependant on how bad I was she will allow poses to be missed and leaving the shower as I may struggle to stand for any length of time. Sick notes are for one week at a time, so that’s the same for Master and Daddy.
  6. With Daddy, fortnightly, do a Maintenance spanking.
  7. Miss Adira is happy for me to be me, we still wanted our sassy, bratty times together, she likes a bit of cheek, so she will not want me to do or be anything other than me. Though there may be a point to which she may say enough is enough. I’m not sure yet how far that will be, but knowing me, I will soon try to figure it out.
  8. We will still have our own private chat group, where anything goes, as this is our sister group. Where we can grump, rant, moan or have a giggle over anything, as it’s our private space.

Miss Adira then asked for 4 things I would like to do together or she does to me if I’ve been a good girl. ( by if she means when. )

So after some thought I chose ;

  1. Full body massage, with hand spanking and squirting.
  2. Cuddling on settee, having my hair brushed.
  3. Going for walk to the park, seafront or somewhere, holding hands, chatting, ending with coffee and treat.
  4. Trip out to shops, buying 1 thing, like makeup or sweeties, costing only a couple of pounds.

I had one more suggestion, which I was allowed to say.

    5. Sensory play, tied up, blindfolded, earphones in, and left. Not knowing when you will return, what you would do, what you would use, if it will be nice or if it will hurt. Vampire gloves and paddle, wax play, cheese grater, flogger.

This interested Miss Adira a lot, she suggested rope play, needles or knife play. That bit scared me a bit then, I don’t like the idea of needles going through skin, but she said she wouldn’t do that, she would only prick the skin, a bit like acupuncture. Needles and knife play is something she would love having done to her but Master doesn’t like the idea if doing that. But I’ve said, I will never say no, never. Maybe we can work up to that eventually. Daddy thinks we are both mad for just considering it.

Miss Adira said she would try to phone in the day when shes at work but she would not phone when Daddy was on his lunch break as he always phones me then. ( They work together. ) So that will be nice but also doesn’t interfere with the routine I have with Daddy.

The final thing she asked was to tell her my top 3 favourite toys, whether they are paddles or vibrators, mix them up a bit and my 3 least favourite toys.

  1. Mr Spikey.
  2. Big purple vibrator.
  3. Spanking hammer and tawse.

Telling her my 3 least favourite toys was dangerous though, if I told her then I knew these would be used for punishments. But I couldn’t lie about it, she knew me too well, she knew which ones I really hated so I just made the list.

  1. Loopy.
  2. High impact cane.
  3. Lash.

And so this new dynamic has been formed, it started on Monday. It will be interesting to see how it goes, will it encourage more group play, will it add to our busy dynamic, I hope so, I hope I can handle everyone’s tasks, and not start forgetting them. I hope I can handle everyone’s rules. I certainly wasn’t looking for a Domme for myself but sometimes things just fall into your lap and it fits into your life perfectly just like it did when we first met Daddy and Miss Adira.  I will keep you informed.

Miss Adira’s blog about our change.

What a change

So this week started as any other, until the unexpected happened. So serf said she was tired so I send go to bed to which she said is that an order to which I said yes, she hadn’t been feeling her best so needed to get better for Blackpool. So of to bed she went and I said she was a good girl, a message then from Sir appeared “ little orders and good girls is mommy Dom making an appearance” erm no I replied, I don’t think she could handle another. Now I’m not sure if Sir had messaged serf but obviously the cogs were turning for her serf because then I got a message “what do you think about being my Domme” now in truth it’s something that I’d not really thought about well not in this dynamic. I asked her thoughts she said she quite liked the idea, to have rules and tasks from us all and to serve and please us all. We then began messaging about how it would work and affect us all, I said I would not want to take anytime away from her and her daddy and she agreed. Messages where flying about asking questions both responding rather quickly, and the more I thought about it the more I liked the idea, so minds where set. The question then came what would I call you Serf asked, I didn’t want to be just Miss or Ma’am, I want a different name special just to us so said go find names with meaning so of she went sending me names Eden,Dakota,Adira and a few more besides. I said you pick your favourite 5 and then I’ll pick, I have to admit this was quite hard as the names where all different and had different meanings, so I choose Adira meaning “strong” we continued talking , me explaining I’ll not be all fluffy, to which she said no I don’t think you will I think you’ll be like master( probably not quite but maybe) we then got to what she would like to be called I said it will start with  the same letter as mine so I choose to name Aurora and Asteria I thought I would let her choose, she choose Aurora I must admit this would have been my choice. Now rules and tasks where the next topic, I asked for all her other tasks and rules as I didn’t want any the same. Here are what I set for everyday good morning and a goodnight message, picture of her bum and boobs as they are very very yummy, something that will make me smile ( now I knew this would send her into a tizz as it’s so vague), and to pose in a submissive pose of my choosing and for a length of time all have to be completed by 6pm. Weekly write a erotic story/poem no more than 1A4 page. Monthly dress up all sexy, full hair and make up. Now to give you an incite into my next ones, Serf is very shy when it comes to us playing it’s not something she has much experience in so is very nervous so my next ones are to encourage her to feel more comfortable and confident in this therefore to enhance our individual play but also, 3 and 4some play. So when every time we see each other she has to greet me with a passionate kiss( oh how I love a good kiss) she has to tough my intimately ( so either boobs, inner thighs or as she would say my happy spot ) now I know again she will be in a tizz about these but the more she does the easier it will be when this rule changes to you have to make me cum whenever we are together, when on a sleepover she will shower with me and wash me or my hair, or if on a visit paint my nails. These are all I’ve stated for now but there will be ad-hoc ones as I know how mush she likes surprises. I said we will start on Monday as we have a busy weekend. Oh I’ve thrown in a maintenance spanking with her Daddy aswell ( that should be fun, as I think she’s bit nervous about a hand spanking from me as she has seen the marks I’ve left on Rs bottom”

I’ve established some thing she dislikes and likes so these can be used for when she’s been a good or not so good girl , things she would like us to do if she’s been especially good, one that has really peaked my interest and I know really turns her on at the thought is sensory play, so this play journey is new to us both ( well she tried with her master but wasn’t for him) so should bond us as we will have to learn and grow together with this.  

I’m sure there is more to add but it all happened so fast.

Welcome to our journey as Miss Adira and Aurora, I hope you enjoy the ride as much as we will

A foursome.

Weekend with Daddy and PiggyJ. Part 2. A foursome.

After Daddy and I got back from Build-a-Bear, we were getting ready for a chill before going to Blackpool but I soon got a message from Master for us both to get naked and join them in bed.

This was a new one, the 4 of us actually playing together, so we stripped off and headed upstairs. Master told Daddy to lie on the bed whilst I bent over the edge of it, sucking his starbar. ( You know what I mean by starbar, I’m only allowed to use alternate words to curse/rude words now but it just sounds daft saying starbar, but I’ve got to get used to writing it. )

So whilst I’m sucking on Daddy’s star bar, Master came behind me and began fudging me from behind, when he first entered my happy spot I felt myself stretch so wide, I thought he must have had his huge PA in but apparently he didn’t. But it felt really nice, as he went from my happy spot to bottom hole.

Whilst this was happening, PiggyJ was lay in bed watching until Master instructed her to come over and eat my happy spot. She got on her knees immediately, tonguing, sucking my clit. Her nails scraping across my bottom, leaving angry red trails down it, yet felt so good. It was becoming hard to concentrate, too many things happening at once. Master watched for a while, he could see I was enjoying myself, my groans and twitches indicated that PiggyJ was doing a good job, Daddy was enjoying his blowjob too.

Master began wanking himself off watching us play together, all of us were occupied with what they were doing and what was happening to them. Soon Master had cum all over PiggyJ’s back, when Master told her to change places with me and continue Daddy’s blowjob. PiggyJ then told me to lick Master’s cum off her back whilst she was busy, this is something I’m not keen on doing, so I stared at her, then stared at Master who then told me to just do it. Apparently I gave them both my death stare. So I moved round and began to clean her back, much to Master’s amusement. He began tickling my back, I asked him to scratch it like he does with PiggyJ, so he scraped his nails up and down my back, over my bottom and back again. I loved it.

Then Daddy and PiggyJ asked if she could climb on top of him, Master agreed, so me and Master stood back to watch. PiggyJ began flailing around as her orgasm built up, groaning and grunting louder until it exploded, Daddy got cramp right up his leg so he didn’t get the pleasure of cumming but I knew he would later.

Once PiggyJ and Daddy had calmed down we all said thank you to each other, kisses were given and we all got dressed ready to go to Blackpool.

Blackpool was very cold and windy but we were able to park across the road from the arcade we were going to. We took money out if the cash machine, each of us having £20 and no more, then we split up. Daddy and I went one way, Master and PiggyJ went another. We cashed one £10 note into 2p’s, and went to the arcade games that were 2p a go and you could collect tickets.

Tickets mean prizes.

Many of the machines were either stuck or not giving tickets to we went to different games. Eventually we won about 1500 tickets. Daddy cashed them in for a voucher and then we joined the queue to pick the prizes. I chose some burping putty/slime stuff for Master, a teddy bear for PiggyJ, as I had one last time, then a load of sweets. Tickets used we left the arcade and headed to a sweet shop nearby. Picking fudge and sweets for everyone we quickly headed back to the car. It was freezing.

We drove to the other end of  Blackpool’s promenade to the chip shop we liked, the boys went in to get our dinner, then we drove to a quiet parking spot in front of the sea. It was a pity it was dark and you couldn’t see the sea at all. But you could hear the waves, smell the sea, plus our fish and chip dinner. Which was yummy.

Once we had eaten, we headed back home, it was after 10pm when we got home but we all got a drink and sat down to watch a film which didn’t end until 12.30am. Master and PiggyJ headed upstairs whilst Daddy and I got the airbed pumped up, making the bed we snuggled watching TV, having a little play with Daddy’s starbar he got on his knees and came over my happy spot but I was too sore to let him play with me. I know I’d be in trouble if I didn’t tell him I was sore, but I had a brilliant day so i didn’t mind.

I was still sore the following morning, so there was no playing but again I didn’t mind. It had been a great weekend.

But from the Monday, there will be a change to our dynamic, a new, exciting change, that hopefully will add even more fun and spankings to our group. I will

Buying a new cuddily.

Weekend with Daddy and PiggyJ. Part 1, buying a new cuddily.

This weekend was going to be a very special one. As a reward for being a good girl, Daddy was taking me to Build-a-Bear I was allowed a new cuddily.

And then we were going to Blackpool to play in the amusement arcades, finishing the evening with a fish and chip dinner.

Master and I arrived at 1pm, Daddy and I decided to go straight out as we knew it would be busy at the shopping centre, plus it left Master and PiggyJ to have some time alone, which I knew PiggyJ was wanting.

So off we went to the Trafford Centre in Manchester and oh my goodness, how busy was it. We drove around for ages looking for a car parking space, ending up right at the far end. Luckily it was a disabled spot. But we were at the wrong end for Build-a-Bear and I mean right at the other side of the centre. So we had a long walk until finally we found it, though we had to ask where the shop was coz Daddy couldn’t remember. Looking at their online shop and I hseen a rabbit I loved, so I thought I would just go in and find it straightaway. No, it wasn’t there, there were 2 bunnies that I liked, but couldn’t

decide which one I preferred. It was heaving in the shop, kids, prams, adults plus loads of staff you struggled to actually see everything.

Finally I chose the white rabbit with flowers, then we joined the queue. A staff member asked if I wanted to record a voice message to put in the cuddily, I had already asked Daddy if I could have one and he had said yes but he had no idea what to . When we reached the place to stuff the bears, I changed my mind on which rabbit I wanted so Daddy had to go back and change it for me. Finally we got to stuff the rabbit but Daddy had to go in a quiet back room to record the message, then we went back to stuff the rabbit, putting the recorder in one arm, then I had to put a wishing well heart inside too. Finally the rabbit was stuffed and sewn up, I wasn’t bothered about telling the lady that my Daddy was buying it for me, or when Daddy had said that I had been a good girl, not like the first time we went. I had felt a bit embarrassed when he told the man, I’m her Daddy, then said if I lose my cuddily he would give me a spanking, right in front of him. And he did hear it, I was really embarrassed then. Now 7 months later I’m not bothered at all, Daddy was buying me a present and that’s all it was.

Then came the decision of what outfit to buy, again I had already picked on outfit online but I wanted to be sure. So I wandered up and down, looking at clothes, finding a new outfit for Minxsie, my first bear, but couldnt find the outfit for the rabbit. I know I was taking my time, but you’ve gotta have the outfit you really want. But I had to ask in the end, luckily they had what I wanted, the ballerinas outfit, so I took that. We then had to christen the bear, filling out my details and announcing the birth of Marshmallow.

Daddy bought my rabbit but I bought the clothes, ( I still feel uncomfortable with him spending loads on me ) then we left.

We got nearly to the other side of the shopping centre when I asked Daddy if the birth certificate was in the box, he looked and it wasn’t. So we had to walk all the way back to get it, by this time I started to feel really sore but I really wanted the certificate. Finally we headed towards the car, but we stopped for a coffee and slice of cake, I must admit I was ready for the break, we weren’t sure what time we were leaving for Blackpool but the rest was really appreciated.

Two weeks with a chest infection and getting very fed up now.

Two weeks with chest infection.

I’m getting really fed up with being on sick leave, after 2 months with my back/ chronic  pain being so severe, 2 weeks of feeling well, I get this chest infection.

Coming to the end of week 2, still coughing like crazy, 2 lots of antibiotics and inhalers, plus steroids and my chest is still as tight as it was at the start. Never had one before, apparently dr said that was very lucky as I have asthma, but feeling drained is an understatement.

Yesterday I thought I was at the end of it, felt energetic, well my version of energetic. Cleaned the shower, kitchen, irons my sons shirts for his new job starting Monday  and cleaned out our bearded dragons home. Probably overdone it.

It’s gotta start feeling better coz me, Master, Daddy and PiggyJ are going to Blackpool, play in the arcades and staying over at their house.

But we seem to be giving each others cold germs, one after the other, Daddy has a bad cold now, Master is still snotty from his cold last week. PiggyJ was the first to have a cold but it seems to have cleared completely. But it’s not gonna stop us meeting each other, I’m really looking forward to it.

PiggyJ’s lines and frogs punishment for telling Master to f off.

  Piggy And The Frogs

So I know your all probably expecting this to be a blog form Serf, well it’s not it’s piggy’s turn to tell you about her exploits and trouble I  to managed to find herself in…….

Well it was a Saturday visit from Sir and serf, visit not a sleep over so our time together was shorter than a sleepover. The visit started as they usually do, I’m naked when they arrive kisses and cuddles are given to everyone. I made the brews, one day I will get it right I always get Sir and serfs coffees mixed up so have to ask. Coffees where drank, the. Sir said “right it’s nearly 3, both of you upstairs and get naked. I already was, so serf stood up and started to undress……..now no doubt Serf will tell you more about the play.

R(my hubby n serfs Daddy) then came home so they said their hellos and me and Sir then. Joined them, downstairs, we then all started with a drink, I started with WKD which in truth didn’t last long in fact I’d drank it by the time dinner was gotten. I then started with the wine(and here was my first mistake), we had dinner and and started to watch a film. I was lay on Sirs lap, jokari in hand he kept swatting ,my bum and thigh. I continued to drink my wine feeling the effects now, now this bit is a bit fuzzy but what I do know is I told Sir to “fuck off” now I’m allowed to swear unlike serf however I’m not allowed to swear at Sir. When it came out of my mouth there was a gasp form R and serf and how they didn’t get whiplash with how fast there heads turned towards me and  then looking at Sir I don’t know. Then there was silence, I looked at Sir saying sorry, a shake of the head and I knew, and then we will discuss this tomorrow. I knew I was in trouble, but I also knew he won’t discuss it now.He then patted his legs for me to lie down again, I lay back down, thinking what I am going to get punishment wise, now my usual punishment start at 50 with an implement of Sirs choice, nervous at what Sir would decide.The evening continued film watched and the time for then time for them to leave, again Sir said we will discuss the f bomb tomorrow sheepishly I said okay.

So Sunday messages exchanged but nothing, had Sir forgot and then the message I’d been waiting for, 10 yes 10 A4 pages of lines “I must not swear at Sir,I’m sorry.”by Tuesday. I asked front and back he replied yes so I knew I needed to get a move on as I was swimming Monday night I’m normally last minute with things. So I made a start Sunday managed to get 3 pages done, I didn’t realise how long lines take to do, as it’s not one off my tasks. Monday before work I started to do more, I spoke with serf who said she n daddy thought my lines where a bit lenient, I said that I didn’t believe this was it and I was expecting more. I spent my lunch Monday doing more lines and then again on Tuesday morning I managed to have them finished early. I did however half way through have a mini panic, I hadn’t put any punctuation in, would Sir pick up on this, if I didn’t have it would I have to do them again. So I went through them again adding the punctuation. I then sent pictures and video to Sir and waited. I then got a message excellent….now….google how to make a origami frog…..what I thought(well actually Wtf)….to be done by Thursday so I had two days to make 10 origami frogs. Monday I googled it how many videos are there, loads of videos the  first ones I found they where with smaller pieces of paper. I amended my search to A4 origami frogs, watching a video they ripped the paper,Omg I thought can I rip the paper, I asked if I could I didn’t get an answer so I thought I’m gonna have to. I tried to do a few to no avail….I then tried to do one fully 45 minutes later,45 minutes and my patience tested to its limit,( to the point where I nearly messaged Sir saying I can’t do it. I then remember a time where I said I couldn’t do a punishment he’d set, and believe me that’s not something I want to repeat) I had one done only 9 to go now once I’d figured out a part away I went. I finished them all by end of the day. Again pictures and videos sent, thinking maybe that was it. How wrong was I message came through…excellent…..now…give the frogs to 10 people….I thought this is easy the time scale of Saturday lunch seemed far to easy. I’ll just give them to work colleagues…as I was replying a message came through that I missed….oh did I say they have to be strangers, and then I want a selfie…once I saw this let’s say I said a few swear words….I was thinking where does Sir think of these ideas. Thursday morning I started shift early, my first stranger a different cleaner. Explaining what I had to do, I could see on his face he thought I was a loon…I had to do this 9 more times, people will think I’m a nutter, so out I went on my break looking for people who I thought wouldn’t get me sectioned…I managed to find 5 strangers to give my frogs to…I left it there for Thursday. Friday I got into work early, lingering outside work I approached people on their way into work, now I don’t know if they where still sleepy but these people seemed a bit more enthused to partake in getting my frogs some where even quite impressed. There where people who just went no or when I said about pictures I got my frogs back. I managed it though 10 people now have my froggy, however I’m kinda hoping I don’t see them again, as it was my lines that I had to right, they may ask what’s going on. I done it though all pictures sent to Sir, Sir said top froggin…there was no…..now….finally I thought I’m done

How wrong was I, so this afternoon another message….to finalise the swearing piggy , frog punishment write a blog about the experience…..so here it is

What have I learnt….don’t swear at Sir….maybe drink less wine (although we have a giggle when we drink) and finally…..I’ve learnt that my Sir is an evil genius and I think I need to buy him a white pussy cat.

Swearing last week.


Last night I was going to the theatre with my Mother-in-law and her group of friends. I go with them all the time, it feels like I’ve been adopted as their daughter, by all of them. But it’s really nice and they are all lovely ladies.

They know about my disability but they’ve never seen me at my worst with my chronic pain.

The theatre we go to put on brilliant, hilarious shows, though last nights wasn’t, but the seats are more like church pews, very hard wooden seats with a tiny cushion and a very hard back. I’m often sore when we go, but as Master had said once, “You enjoy the shows, the company, the food. So if you need a few days rest to recover then so be it. You have to still live your life.”

But after having the last 2 months on sick leave, unable to go out at all, due to a shockingly bad flare up, I hoped it was finally over. Last week was the first time I’d been shopping, or just gone out, so I thought going to the theatre would be fine.

But by the time I got to the theatre I felt my back begin to pound and throb. Luckily my Mother-in-law had some diazepam in her bag so I took one, hoping this would ease the pain. It worked for half an hour, then the sharp spasm pains began. It was really hard sitting in the one awkward position before we could finally get up and leave the theatre.

Walking was extremely painful and I knew I was getting slower. One of the ladies took my handbag and walked with me, finally reaching the car was such a relief for me.

BUT, I couldn’t get in the car, my Mother-in-law has a high up car, with no side step, as I tried to get one leg up, I couldn’t then bend to get in. The lady with my bag suggested I kneel up first, so I tried that. It took me a few goes before I swore, “ Fudging hell.” as I fell, face forwards onto the car seat. Finally I was kneeling on the door frame, I turned my body into the footwell, facing the seat. From there I was able to pull myself up, turn and collapse into the seat. I felt so humiliated and ashamed of myself just not being able to climb into the car, my back was pounding as I got my seat belt on, the lady put my bag on the floor then carefully closed the door.

As we drove home I starting thinking about Daddy and about me swearing. I was so mad with myself as I’d been really good at not using bad language, I hadn’t said the f bomb in weeks. I may have said it in my head, but even that was rare.

I knew I had to tell Daddy, but I was scared of his response, and honestly, I was scared of having a mouth soaping. But mostly I felt like I had let him down, I’d let myself down and I was very disappointed in myself.

I decided when I got home that I was going to do my ‘arrived home safe’ message as a video. I needed to own up there and then. So holding the phone up, I firstly told him about the play, then chatted about the meal and the ladies before I told him. Explaining how I couldn’t get in the car and about me swearing. Suddenly all my emotions flooded out, as I began to cry, telling him over and over that I’d let him down, I’d ruined 2 really good weeks with this, that I was so so sorry. I stuttered, heaving deep breaths. Daddy was going to be so cross I thought as I continued the message, before saying night night and hanging up.

I went to bed with a heavy heart,  guilt is a terrible thing to drag you down. As I got into bed, the dogs finally settled, I hugged Minxsie bear, before finally going to sleep and I slept really well for once.

When I got up and woke up properly, I looked at my messages, I was nervous when I saw Daddy had left me a message, so I clicked play. I heard his reply, he understood why the f bomb slipped out, and as my Daddy he had to decide why the situation happened and if it warranted a punishment. On this occasion, knowing how bad the last 2 months had been, he was not going to punish me for it. If I had sworn in a road rage or just during a chat, that would be a different matter. He was not going to alter my behaviour chart, or even put in a comment about it. But young lady this does not mean I’m being a soft Daddy, left me tell you now, this is not a free pass for you to swear whenever you feel like it, you will feel the wrath of Daddy if you start swearing again. But for now, you have not let me down, you’ve not let yourself down or anything else.

I breathed deeply whilst I listened to him, relieved yet still upset with myself but grateful Daddy wasn’t cross with me. I guess sometimes on the very rare occasion, Daddy could forgive me for swearing but only on a very rare occasion. I just need to forgive myself now too.

I was surprised how upset I was, making me realise how much I wanted to please not just Master but Daddy too and how much better it feels being a good girl than a bratty girl always in trouble. Though I know the bratty side will come out at times but if it’s only every now and then I don’t think that’s too bad.

Sorry I’ve not been blogging much.


Well after my 2 month sick leave, due to my back, I had 2 lovely weeks of slowly getting back into doing things, knowing I still had to be very careful with my back.

During my second week I began to get a cold. Unfortunately one of those things that pass from person to person, especially when they are all play partners. PiggyJ started first, then Daddy, followed by Master, then shortly after me. It’s one of those colds that prolongs leaving your body, but PiggyJ and Daddy were soon fine whilst Master’s and mine would not leave. Last week I began to lose my voice, ( wehey I hear Master and Daddy shouting, ) by Monday night I had no voice and a very nasty chesty cough. Master said I needed to go to the doctors, which I did on Tuesday only to be told I’ve a bad chest infection.

Never had one before so first time for everything I guess.

Day 2 of antibiotics and I’m feeling a bit better as long as I don’t laugh or cough. Though I feel pretty wiped out doing the smallest job and hearing my chest squeak and wheeze is quite amusing, like having a pet mouse squeak at me.  Blimey I must feel I’ll if I find that amusing. Anyway hopefully I will get back to doing regular blogs soon. Hope you are all doing okay.

Anyway I have a couple of blogs I’ve just not posted so even though they will be a few weeks overdue, I will still post them.

Cursing.

Swearing.

Last night I was going to the theatre with my Mother-in-law and her group of friends. I go with them all the time, it feels like I’ve been adopted as their daughter, by all of them. But it’s really nice and they are all lovely ladies.

They know about my disability but they’ve never seen me at my worst with my chronic pain.

The theatre we go to put on brilliant, hilarious shows, though last nights wasn’t, but the seats are more like church pews, very hard wooden seats with a tiny cushion and a very hard back. I’m often sore when we go, but as Master had said once, “You enjoy the shows, the company, the food. So if you need a few days rest to recover then so be it. You have to still live your life.”

But after having the last 2 months on sick leave, unable to go out at all, due to a shockingly bad flare up, I hoped it was finally over. Last week was the first time I’d been shopping, or just gone out, so I thought going to the theatre would be fine.

But by the time I got to the theatre I felt my back begin to pound and throb. Luckily my Mother-in-law had some diazepam in her bag so I took one, hoping this would ease the pain. It worked for half an hour, then the sharp spasm pains began. It was really hard sitting in the one awkward position before we could finally get up and leave the theatre.

Walking was extremely painful and I knew I was getting slower. One of the ladies took my handbag and walked with me, finally reaching the car was such a relief for me.

BUT, I couldn’t get in the car, my Mother-in-law has a high up car, with no side step, as I tried to get one leg up, I couldn’t then bend to get in. The lady with my bag suggested I kneel up first, so I tried that. It took me a few goes before I swore, “ Fudging hell.” as I fell, face forwards onto the car seat. Finally I was kneeling on the door frame, I turned my body into the footwell, facing the seat. From there I was able to pull myself up, turn and collapse into the seat. I felt so humiliated and ashamed of myself just not being able to climb into the car, my back was pounding as I got my seat belt on, the lady put my bag on the floor then carefully closed the door.

As we drove home I starting thinking about Daddy and about me swearing. I was so mad with myself as I’d been really good at not using bad language, I hadn’t said the f bomb in weeks. I may have said it in my head, but even that was rare.

I knew I had to tell Daddy, but I was scared of his response, and honestly, I was scared of having a mouth soaping. But mostly I felt like I had let him down, I’d let myself down and I was very disappointed in myself.

I decided when I got home that I was going to do my ‘arrived home safe’ message as a video. I needed to own up there and then. So holding the phone up, I firstly told him about the play, then chatted about the meal and the ladies before I told him. Explaining how I couldn’t get in the car and about me swearing. Suddenly all my emotions flooded out, as I began to cry, telling him over and over that I’d let him down, I’d ruined 2 really good weeks with this, that was so so sorry. I stuttered, heaving deep breaths. Daddy was going to be so cross I thought as I continued the message, before saying night night and hanging up.

I went to bed with a heavy heart,  guilt is a terrible thing to drag you down. As I got into bed, the dogs finally settled, I hugged Minxsie bear, before finally going to sleep and I slept really well for once.

When I got up and woke up properly, I looked at my messages, I was nervous when I saw Daddy had left me a message, so I clicked play. I heard his reply, he understood why the f bomb slipped out, and as my Daddy he had to decide why the situation happened and if it warranted a punishment. On this occasion, knowing how bad the last 2 months had been, he was not going to punish me for it. If I had sworn in a road rage or just during a chat, that would be a different matter. He was not going to alter my behaviour chart, or even put in a comment about it. But young lady this does not mean I’m being a soft Daddy, left me tell you now, this is not a free pass for you to swear whenever you feel like it, you will feel the wrath of Daddy if you start swearing again. But for now, you have not let me down, you’ve not let yourself down or anything else.

I breathed deeply whilst I listened to him, relieved yet still upset with myself but grateful Daddy wasn’t cross with me. I guess sometimes on the very rare occasion, Daddy could forgive me for swearing but only on a very rare occasion. I just need to forgive myself now too.

I was surprised how upset I was, making me realise how much I wanted to please not just Daddy but Master too and how much better it feels being a good girl than a bratty girl always in trouble. Though I know the bratty side will come out at times but if it’s only every now and then I don’t think that’s too bad.